Of Course Rebel Wilson's Being Offered Money to Lose Weight

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Diet companies are reportedly “battling” over having Rebel Wilson as their spokesperson, in a depressing real-life analogue of the Hunger Games. An insider claims that she is “asking for a fortune.”

Radar Online enthuses that “viewers could get a front-row seat to her slim down on her ABC series” (barf) (1,000 barfs) (endless sea of barfs), but the source states that Rebel “would be doing this strictly for the money.” Jessica Simpson’s endorsement deal with Weight Watchers, for instance, was $4 million — so Wilson could definitely stand to make a lot. She also has a history with the industry: she was the spokesperson for Jenny Craig Australia in 2012.

But still. Why does a hilarious, talented, plus-size woman always have to be plus-size before all else? If she’s happy and healthy as she is, can’t we just… leave her alone? [Radar Online]

Lady Gaga has revealed the cover art for ARTPOP. It features a sculpture by Jeff Koons (DID YOU KNOW THAT LADY GAGA LIKES KOONS? I think she might have mentioned it once or twice) that looks sort of like this dragon sculpture from SkyMall. The piece itself will be exhibited at the album’s release party, feat. lots of contemporary artists. [MTV]

According to Koons scholar Lynne Warren, this will cement Gaga’s status as an icon. “Jeff seems to have really good senses to choose people who are not only at the height of their careers, but are going to be iconic. They won’t be remembered just because he made art out of them, they will be remembered on for their own contributions.” she says. [MTV]

Beautiful alien baby/very smart young woman Lorde argues that being critical of the current state of pop doesn’t automatically make her a “hater.” She’s been labeled a bit of one, seeing as she’s criticized Justin Bieber for not providing “a real depiction of what it’s like to be a young person,” she’s stated that Taylor Swift seems “flawless and unattainable” (she has since clarified that she didn’t mean it as an insult, because the media loves cat fights so much that they’ll take the word “flawless” as a mean and horrible diss?), and she’s called out Selena Gomez for having anti-feminist themes in her songs.

Here’s what she has to say:

“I think there’s a funny culture in music that’s only happened over the last 15 years, that if you have an opinion about something in music that isn’t 100-percent good, you’re a ‘hater,’ even if you have perfectly reasonable grounds for that critique. People will say exactly what they think about a movie or a TV show, and that’s fine, but as soon as you say it about a record, you’re like some little zombie in a funny dungeon.”

Sometimes stuff is very bad. Deal with it. [MTV]

  • Justin Bieber‘s new song is probably about Selena Gomez (it could also be about the monkey he abandoned in Germany, I AM JUST SAYING). [OK!]
  • Or it could be about this joint he was photographed smoking. Just kidding, that was way after the fact. [TMZ]
  • John Lennon‘s Hollywood star was defaced by a pack of morons with Sharpies. It seems they hoped to honor his memory by drawing wobbly mushrooms and writing garbled messages of love, proving once again that humans have an unquenchable thirst for destruction. [Billboard]
  • Beyonce is releasing her first calendar this year, rendering the Gregorian calendar obsolete. [Bossip]
  • Lisa D’Amato from America’s Next Top Model won’t stop talking about her placenta smoothie. #controversy #placentavitamins #yum [E!]
  • Kanye West is reportedly obsessed with Kim Kardashian and keeps pressuring her to get married, but she is not ready yet. Isn’t “being the only person Kanye follows on Twitter” a more legally binding contract than matrimony, though? Idk. [NY Daily News]
  • Halle Berry and her husband Olivier Martinez have named their newborn son Maceo Robert Martinez. [Hello!]
  • Paris Hilton‘s full track (feat. Lil Wayne) is FINALLY online. “Yeah, let’s party/Woo, let’s party and have a good time,” she rasps monotonously. WATCH THE VIDEO, YOU WILL NOT REGRET IT. (You will regret it). [Just Jared]
  • Taylor Momsen, the artist formerly known as Lil J from Gossip Girl, was in Maxim lookin’ sultry and angry. [ONTD]
  • Britney Spears and Aaron Paul tweeted at each other. [ONTD]
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