Jenelle decided to tell Barb about how she will definitely fail her upcoming drug test because she got high with her friends. But she has a plan! She will drink some kind of detox thing that she will purchase at a tobacco shop and everything will be fine. Except we know that it won’t. And so does Barb. But it’s as visible as her exposed bra straps that she no longer has any fucks left to give.
Jenelle did try the detox drink which almost made her puke. And it was pointless because she failed the drug test. Barb called to check in and a sobbing Jenelle told her what happened and that the probation officer “is going to violate me.” (Does she even know what she’s saying anymore?) The Teen Mom 2 editors punctuated this with a cutesy cartoon of a detox bottle tipping over and spilling.
She spends the rest of the episode sobbing in her car with the Ed Hardy-upholstered seats. She stopped by the park to see Jace but she and Barb got in a heated discussion about how much she loves weed and needs weed and can’t live without weed and will probably go to jail—all while her toddler son was presumably playing on the jungle gym with no adult supervision.
Barb gives her some motherly advice: “Jenelle, I know yah upset and awwl, but tha main thing ta do is stahp smokin’ weed.”
Jenelle is almost stupidly honest: “I’m not gonna be able to quit. When I get upset to the point where I have to smoke to get rid of the feelings that I’m feeling so I don’t feel like it for hours, that’s when I smoke.”
As for Leah, she’s still going through her divorce and she’s dealing with it by wearing more eyeliner.
And then there’s Chelsea. Ugh. She quit her job at the tanning salon Year Round Brown, which is disappointing because it was fun hearing her say that with a South Dakota accent. The irony is that she quit because she got in a fight with her boss. She told her father, “When he’s mean to me, I get my feelings hurt, so I don’t want to go back.” If only that worked with her baby daddy Adam, who has been terrible to her, repeatedly. Anyway, Adam—whose T-shirts never have sleeves or even sides—gave her a promise ring.
When is this girl finally going to get her GED finished and get into hair school? It simply must happen. I don’t believe I’ve ever seen anyone who was so desperately in need of a hair education. How is it that someone could be so obviously invested in her personal appearance, only to consistently style her hair to look as though it smells like french fries?
