The most unintentionally hilarious part of any women’s magazine is the stupid monthly quiz that celebrates obvious stereotypes and cliches. So what better way to spend a Saturday than to make one of our own?
- A: Wonder how Aretha Franklin’s lyrics apply to this situation
- B: Instantly start crying, because they’ll never measure up to your first love.
- C: Run after them screaming, “Hey baby! You know you want some of THIS!”
- D: Roll your eyes and get back to your powerful magazine editing job.
- E: Instantly head to the MAC counter
Question 2: You’re attending a wedding in three days. You think to yourself:
- A: I wonder who the DJ is?
- B: Weddings are a sham put on by people who don’t believe in REAL love
- C: I should buy the sluttiest dress I can and hope that the bartender knows how to make a good Cosmo!
- D: I hope I can bring my laptop to the reception so I can concentrate on my powerful magazine editing job
- E: I hope Stacey and Clinton call me back before then!
Question 3: It’s Your Birthday! You’re going to celebrate by:
- A: Getting your dancing shoes on….and then dancing around your apartment
- B: Go out with that guy you’ve been dating for 5 years who is perfectly nice but not, you know, your REAL love
- C: Chippendales first, the club second, drunken shenanigans third, and who cares what happens after that?
- D: Celebrating birthdays is a waste of time and energy that interferes with your powerful magazine editing job
- E: Going on a whirlwind shopping spree with someone who is more attractive, and therefore better, than you are
Question 4: Your dream date would be:
- A: Someone who knows how to give me R-E-S-P-E-C-T!
- B: Reliving that time in 9th grade when Bryan kissed you by the swingset you both grew up near
- C: Dating is for losers! I just want to get drunk and get laid! Woo! Cosmos!!! Shoooooes!!!
- D: I’d like to meet someone who will sit silently by while I work on my powerful magazine editing job
- E: Someone who loves me for who I am. Or at least who I am under 80 pounds of makeup.
Question 5: In the end, the love you take is equal to:
- A: Wait, wait, I know that song!
- B: The love that was taken from me 15 years ago by my REAL love
- C: Perfectly acceptable, as long as you wear protection and get him to buy you some shoes
- D: I don’t know. But it certainly isn’t equal to my powerful magazine editing job.
- E: Approximately $4298 worth of hair and beauty products
So which romantic comedy cliche are you? We’ll announce the results in a new post shortly.