According to a new report from New York Magazine, Kristi Noem might be the face of the Department of Homeland Security, but Corey Lewandowski is running the show.
The country has been forced to endure a lot of bullshit from Kristi Noem in eight short months: her tone-deaf gallivanting, groundless tantrums, unconscionable lows, and the catastrophic damage she’s caused, in general. But, ICE Barbie seemingly can’t destroy America all by herself. Meet ICE Ken.
On Monday, New York Magazine published an in-depth report by Ben Terris on the “top goons” of DHS, saying that while Noem is the “face” of the agency, Corey Lewandowski is actually the “muscle” behind her lunacy. Per the outlet:
Lewandowski has long served as Noem’s gatekeeper, described to me by DHS staff as her “handler,” her “bulldog,” and the “shadow secretary.” They are also widely understood by those who work with them to be romantically attached. (Noem and Lewandowski have both denied this.)
…
On paper, Noem sits at the top of [the DHS] empire. In practice, power over immigration policy is fractured, shaped by competing factions, starting with deputy chief of staff Stephen Miller, who has vowed in the wake of Charlie Kirk’s assassination to destroy nameless forces that have conspired against the right — the long arm of law enforcement, he warned them, “will be used to find you, will be used to take away your money, take away your power, and, if you’ve broken the law, to take away your freedom.” Noem will be among those at the forefront of any such effort, surrounded by a tight inner circle that can be difficult to penetrate and often impossible to work with. “The culture over there is terrible,” the administration official told me. “People are scared shitless of Corey.”
Throughout Noem’s rise to MAGA figurehead status, Lewandowski has reportedly been front and center. The two met in 2019 at a fishing fundraiser in British Columbia when she was an up-and-coming conservative prodigy, and he was an ex-campaign manager for Trump. Meet-cute, much?
During Noem’s stint as South Dakota governor, one staffer told NYMag that Lewandowski was “intimately involved” with her post (ew), and helped her choose which television shows she went on. Apparently, lest her thunder be stolen, he also discouraged her from doing any guest panels. Their relationship hasn’t cooled since.
When Noem was trying to get Trump to pick her as vice president, Lewandowski went with her to D.C., armed with polling data. But Trump would low-key call her Lewandowski’s “girlfriend,” and Trump’s advisors were worried about the relationship after seeing him slap her on the butt. (In 2019, she was also seen sitting on his lap at a conservative conference in Florida.) One FEMA official referred to their relationship as the “worst-kept secret in DC.”
Lewandowski now “[runs] DHS,” with Noem being “just the face of it,” one contractor who’s worked at DHS explained. Apparently, he is the “micromanager” who does the approving and denying of travel requests, the firing and reassigning of agents, and—according to a person close to the administration—challenges any pushback. One person said that Lewandowski once gave orders to one DHS employee, who pushed back that he wasn’t their boss, only to learn that Noem had been lurking the entire time. “She was on the call, in the background, not saying anything,” they said.
ICE Ken—along with a group of higher-ups he’s lamely dubbed the “Four Horsemen”—apparently handles firing top officials, as well. Per the article, after FEMA’s Former Acting Administrator, Cameron Hamilton, publicly said that shuttering FEMA was a bad idea, Lewandowski told him he was out. (Late last month, Hamilton accused the administration of “delaying” essential emergency aid.)
While the romantic involvement (which they both deny) has caused Lewandowski a few issues, he’s done worse than date a cabinet secretary and secretly control an entire government agency. In 2021, he was accused of sexually assaulting a woman at a charity dinner in Nevada, and in September, he was alleged to be pocketing $50,000 directly from the Chinese Communist Party, as well as cash from Israel’s Likud Party. NYMag says DHS denies these allegations.
My favorite part of this absolutely bizarre piece, however, comes from DHS itself—in a statement that reads like a Burn Book entry from Mean Girls: “This NYMag hit piece reads like a preteen rage-scrolling, then prompting ChatGPT for a screed on misogyny—complete with zero substance and maximum bullshit.” You tell ’em, Corey.
