Baby Late


Royal Baby 2.0 was due to arrive on April 23, but today is April 27 and the baby still isn’t here. When confronted about the child’s tardiness, Kensington Palace told Us Weekly, “We have never commented on or discussed a due date.” Interesting, because “multiple sources have confirmed the royal’s due date” to Us Weekly!

So what could explain the baby’s decision to make the world wait?

  • The baby got lost on its way out.
  • The baby is tired.
  • The baby is binging Empire so that it’ll have something to talk about after being born.
  • The baby waiting for the second iteration of the Apple Watch.
  • The baby is rude.
  • The baby is having a hundredth life crisis.
  • The baby is waiting for a bigger photo exclusive offer from Hello! Magazine.
  • The baby is waiting for R8.
  • The baby doesn’t want to meet Charles.
  • The baby doesn’t want to meet Camilla.
  • The baby thought it would’ve been funnier to have been born when the Labour Party was in power.
  • The baby is still trying to regain composure after watching the Bruce Jenner interview.
  • The baby is worried about being second-born.
  • The baby suddenly fears mirrors.
  • The baby doesn’t want to live in a place called Bucklebury Manor.
  • The baby is dreading the 2016 US election cycle.
  • The baby is waiting for TIDAL to fail.
  • The baby wants Queen Elizabeth to sweat.
  • The baby thinks its lips are too small.
  • The baby doesn’t like Corgis.
  • The baby doesn’t want to accidentally read any Game of Thrones spoilers.
  • The baby doesn’t want to meet One Direction now that Zayn’s gone.
  • The baby doesn’t want to be born until someone tells it who Rita Ora is.
  • The baby realized what its life is about to be like.

Image via Getty.

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