Dirt Bag: Billy Elliot Marries Marilyn Manson's Ex-Girlfriend

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Evan Rachel Wood (a.k.a. the Vampire Queen of Louisiana a.k.a. the second-blowjobbiest girl in Thirteen) got totally nuptialed to Jamie Bell (a.k.a. Billy Elliot a.k.a. the man on the ledge’s brother in Man on a Ledge) in an extremely tender ceremony that nobody knew about:

“The bride wore a custom dress by Carolina Herrera,” the rep says in a statement. “It was a small ceremony with close family and friends.”
Wood, rumored to be engaged to Bell since January, first dated him in 2005, after they both costarred in Green Day’s “Wake Me Up When September Ends” music video. The pair got tattoos of each other’s first initial.

Cute! I like these kids. Cute kids. Cute. (Also, did anyone else see Man on a Ledge? Thaaaaaaat moooooooovie haaaaaaaaaaaaahaahahaha.) [People]

Jimmy Kimmel geeks out about interviewing David Letterman and it’s adorable:

“Tonight David Letterman is on the show and the band Vampire Weekend… I’m nervous about it because I’ve been watching David Letterman religiously since I was about 13 years old,” Jimmy said. “When I was a kid, my birthday cake said, ‘Late Night with David Letterman’ on it, my license plate on my car said, ‘Late Night,’ so it’s a big deal for me.”


Nicholas Sparks is working on like 900 new projects. He’s in ur eyeballs jerkin ur tearz:

According to The Hollywood Reporter, Nicholas Sparks and his literary agent Theresa Park will act as executive producers for TNT’s “Bend In The Road,” ABC Family’s “The Falls” and Lifetime’s “Deliverance Creek.”
“Bend In The Road” centers on a sheriff managing life in a coastal Georgia town, while “The Falls” is a modern-day “Romeo And Juliet” tale.
Meanwhile, Lifetime’s “Deliverance Creek” will follow a woman as she attempts to protect her family after the civil war.

So…basically all of them are period pieces about vagueness. Kewl. (Also, here’s a fun fact about you: Nicholas Sparks is watching you while you sleep.) [HuffPo]

Chris Kirkpatrick announced today that he’s taking a break from making this statement about not getting invited to JT’s wedding to devote more time to his hair. [DigitalSpy]

A London film producer named Bill Bungay organized a mass exorcism for his horror film because apparently some dickhead ghosts kept cutting the power during screenings. Everyone’s a critic. [DigitalSpy]

Hurricane Sandy left a boat in Dina Lohan’s neighbor’s yard. I’m no Dina Lo-fan, but maybe we can leave the lady alone just for a couple of days after the OCEAN ATTACKED HER HOUSE? …No? [TMZ]

Justin Bieber hinted that he MIGHT have broken up with Selena Gomez, via a mysterious word jumble on Instagram. It’s like National Treasure: Book of Dicks. [DigitalSpy]

Nicki Minaj loves Miley Cyrus’s Nicki Minaj costume. I kind of do too. [USAToday]

November’s SNL guests will include Anne Hathaway, Rihanna, Jeremy Renner, and Maroon 5. [HuffPo]

A Las Vegas county commissioner says she regrets naming a street after Guns N Roses. [News.au]

Jesus Christ. Michelle Duggar’s scalp finally gave birth to a normal fucking hair-do. [Yahoo!]

My pumpkin rotted. 🙁 [MyPorch]

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