Good News For The Ladies, Bad News For The Boys

It’s Ladies Night (Morning?) in today’s news, with Hillary Clinton’s successful Asia trip and Kathleen Sebelius‘ potential ascendancy, while Burris battles his crazy, Republicans their own rhetoric and Norm Coleman his former constituents

Hillary Clinton just finished making rounds in Indonesia, being serenaded by school children, waxing eloquent about how she wants to change the world and possibly signaling a shift on U.S. policy toward Burma which resembles our policy on Cuba in effectiveness but is broader and deeper in scope. Oh, and she appeared on television and says that she likes the Beatles and the Rolling Stones.

Meanwhile, Kansas Governor Kathleen Sebelius’ name keeps cropping up in discussions about who will replace Tom Daschle as the nominee to helm the Department of Health and Human Services and, reportedly, shepherd Obama’s health care reforms through Congress. Of course, her named cropped up half a dozen times after the election as a potential nominee and she never actually became one, so I’m not holding my breath.

The boys, on the other hand, aren’t having as good a day of it. Illinois Senator and crazyperson Roland Burris gave a press conference yesterday asking for his constituents’ forbearance and bizarrely claiming that former governor Rod Blagojevich had never considered nominating him for the Senate seat to which Blago appointed Burris. Basically, dude’s going nowhere, but he also doesn’t exactly remember how he got there. Oh, and all the Dems who once supported him won’t touch him with a ten foot pole in the hopes that the taint he swore he didn’t have won’t appear on them, either. Americans for a taintless Washington!

In other news, Norm Coleman has a snowball’s chance in hell of retaining his Senate seat in Minnesota, though he’ll keep arguing that he ought to despite what the legal votes say. Rich people (probably mostly dudes) are about to be exposed as tax cheats by Swiss bank UBS since they’ve been, you know, cheating on their taxes like half of Washington. And all those Republicans who pissed and moaned about the stimulus and how bad it is now want their piece of the pork-y delicious pie, and are being called hypocrites since, after all, they are.

Obama’s got some mortgage bailout plan thing going that they’ll probably eventually oppose, too, since it will cost $75 billion or something or because it doesn’t help people with mortgages over $400,000 since they’re obviously middle class families who need a break.