Governors Reach Across the Aisle to Agree the Entire Country Is Fucked

Governors Reach Across the Aisle to Agree the Entire Country Is Fucked
Image:Alex Wong (Getty Images)

Governors far and wide are staring at their budgeting spreadsheets with unadulterated horror after Trump, the man holding America hostage, signed an order authorizing a $400 a week supplement to unemployment claims after the original $600 a week supplement expired at the end of July. But this act of benevolence in helping taxpayers not starve to death disguised just a tiny, tiny loophole: Individual states are on the hook for $100 of the supplement.

The New York Times reported that this could cost states billions of dollars, with the potential cost for New York being $4 billion by the end of the year. While Republicans are still pretending this is a good idea on behalf of their orange leader, Governor Asa Hutchinson of Arkansas broke rank to admit, “That’s not ideal.” Governors from Georgia, Virginia, and West Virginia are also concerned about where they will be pulling the money from, but Governor Jim Justice of West Virginia told the Times, “We’re going to pay that.” He also took a moment to call members of Congress “political babies,” or as Ben Shapiro might say, he called them the p-word. [New York Times]

Continuing to spiral deeper and deeper into his obsession with the border, Trump is now considering blocking American citizens from re-entering the country if they have the coronavirus. The New York Times got ahold of portions of the proposal, which would “[rely] on existing legal authorities of the Centers for Disease Control and Prevention to protect the country,” and potentially “block a citizen or legal resident from crossing the border into the United States if an official ‘reasonably believes that the individual either may have been exposed to or is infected with the communicable disease’.”

Based on the current draft, it is unclear how long an American citizen or legal resident would be blocked from entering the country but with the way things work around here, it might be worth it to leave the US and just never ever come back. [New York Times]

  • Southern Republicans are maybe finally turning on Lindsay Graham. [Politico]
  • Idaho sought to ban trans people from changing their gender on their birth certificate, but a federal judge said the law was unconstitutional. The state legislature is still litigating a case on the discriminatory ban of transgender girls on all-girl sports teams. It must really suck to live in Idaho. [NBC News]
  • Andrew Yang was not pleased to find out he was not invited to speak at the Democratic National Convention, so he tweeted about it—which is the internet version of asking to speak to the manager—and may actually get invited to the party. [USA Today]
  • Governor Rick DeSantis thinks Florida kids should go back to school because “the potential benefits of in-person instruction outweigh the health risks of opening schools during the pandemic.” I guess killing grandmas wasn’t enough! [Politico]
  • More than 800 students are in quarantine after potentially being exposed to covid-19 in Georgia. I wonder how their Floridian neighbors feel about this. [AJC]
  • Bernie blogs for a website that is not Jezebel, but we’re not upset about it. [The Guardian]
  • Tuesday is primary day in several states including Minnesota—the future of the Squad is in the hands of the voters. [New York Times]
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