Hillary Clinton Should Pokémon Go…Update Her Playlist
At the Democratic National Convention on Monday night, Clinton walked on stage to "Brave," and walked off to... I'll give you one guess.
Photo: Getty Images Politics Democratic National Convention
CHICAGO —You know how they say famous people get frozen at the age they first became famous? Like how Justin Bieber is permanently mentally 12 years old? I’m starting to think it’s the same case for politicians, except it’s that their minds freeze at the age they lost their biggest election.
This would explain why Hillary Clinton insisted on bookending her Democratic National Convention speech Monday night with those songs. I’ll name them, but I’m sure you already know exactly which ones I’m talking about. She walked out to “Brave” by Sara Bareilles and then walked off to… wait for it… Rachel Platten’s “Fight Song.”
Despite my frustration, I’m actually of a few minds here. For starters, you can’t really think of #ImWithHer without softly singing “I will scream them loud tonight/Can you hear my voice this time?” to yourself. (Only me? I doubt that.) And political conventions are all greatest hits, so it is hard to imagine what other songs she might have chosen. But: She lost! Famously! If you voted for Clinton in 2016, Rachel Patten’s chorus doesn’t exactly bring back good memories. Actually, whenever I hear “‘Cause I’ve still got a lot of fight left in me” now, I have violent flashbacks to stress eating an entire block of cheese and feeling terrorized by that fucking New York Times‘ needle. Then again, I’m sure her team also knows how the culture feels about that specific flavor of pantsuit feminism at this point, so why take a risk and ruin another song? Better the devil you know, and all that.
oh no “fight song” burst out of the Antarctic vault where we had thought it was safely contained
— Alexandra Petri (@petridishes) August 20, 2024
As I continue to sit with these thoughts, I can report that, despite the choice of music, Clinton gave a solid speech. Kathy Hochul did such a terrible job that there was a significant possibility that she ruined the vibes for everyone else—kind of like how one person fell during the women’s balance beam finals at the 2024 Paris Olympics, and then literally almost everyone else (including Simone Biles and Suni Lee) fell off the beam too.
“Progress is possible, but not guaranteed,” Clinton said. “We have to fight for it and never, ever give up. There is always a choice, do we push forward or pull back? Come together as ‘we the people’ or split into us versus them? That’s the choice we face in this election.” That’s some very nice speechwriting. She also mentioned Shirley Chisholm and Geraldine Ferraro, received what felt like a two-minute standing ovation, cited Trump’s 34 convictions, and then took a very long pause to enjoy the entire convention center chanting, “lock him up.” Honestly, I would have preferred that as the walk-off song.
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