Leonardo DiCaprio Is a Lackluster Kisser, Says Model

Are we at all surprised that the Oscar-winning actor and terminal bachelor is a bad kisser? Not at all.

Leonardo DiCaprio Is a Lackluster Kisser, Says Model

There are a few things I’m quite sure of in life and chief among them is that Leonardo DiCaprio is probably a low-effort makeout. Why? Because when you’ve won an Oscar and have been considered a mainstream heartthrob since the nineties, you can afford to be. Frankly, I wouldn’t even blame him.

Ordinarily, my assumption would just be considered conjecture, but some evidence arrived this week when a loose-lipped, 23-year-old model spoke to Dutch Playboy. According to Hieke Konings, she learned for herself when she met DiCaprio out in Los Angeles: “It was in a secret club in LA, one of those clubs where you can only get in by invitation,” she said in the March 2024 issue of the magazine, according to Page Six. “I saw him sitting there in his black hoodie and black cap, and we made eye contact.”

Allegedly, DiCaprio’s manager then swiftly approached her (“less than a minute later”) and informed her that the actor wanted to talk to her. Naturally, she obliged and made her way to his table where she later initiated a makeout.

“We kissed for a while, and then he asked me to come home with him,” Konings claimed. “I said no. He reacted very shocked. Of course he wasn’t used to it. When I said I didn’t know him well enough, he responded sweetly, ‘I respect that.’ Whereupon he turned to another girl and took her home.” Now, while imagining him telling a 23-year-old he respected her decision not to sleep with him made me giggle, it’s not a shock. Nor is her actual reason for declining his offer. Basically, he was a shitty kisser. When describing the experience, Konings said it was, “OK” but “definitely not the best.”

“I had heard from other girls that he could be very strange,” she added. “For example, one friend said he kept his earphones in during sex because he didn’t want to hear her—and another said he even put a pillow on her head.” To be fair, I have absolutely no connection to the DiCaprio club set and even I have heard that rumor.

However, a source insisted to Page Six that this interaction never actually happened.

“This story is an amalgamation of other false stories,” the source (which I glean is someone close to DiCaprio) told the tabloid, adding that Konings’ story is “clearly an approach for clicks [and] publicity.”

False or not, I am amused by Konings’ conclusion to the story. When asked how she ended that night: “I went home, ordered McDonald’s and called my mom.”

That is the only correct response to a lackluster kiss from a man pushing 50!

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