Oh, of COURSE Anastasia Steele Wears Glossier


In Glossier’s relatively short existence, the make-up company has done so brilliant a job at marketing its no-frills, minimalist, unfussy cool-girl aesthetic that it has already become cultural shorthand unto itself. Their advertising tends to depict—and their cultish acolytes tend to be—busy women going for that no-makeup makeup, shit you can slather on your face to look beautiful and dewy but not like you tried to hard, which would imply that you care too much, which is absolutely not part of your feminist estilo. In other words, it’s a little like Goop for millennials. As Nitasha Tiku put it in her excellent profile on the brand last year, it is “studied effortlessness, not puffy and greasy-haired, six hours deep into a Netflix binge still caked with the remnants of last night’s mascara.”

Anastasia Steele, the naive, aspiring book editor who gets into PG-13 BDSM with her zillionaire lover Christian Grey in the Fifty Shades series, OBVIOUSLY wears Glossier. Obviously! She definitely thinks it is somewhat edgy and also likes people to know (or think) that she just fucked, which is Glossier’s entire collection of sex-flush tubes. (Hey guys? “Milky Jelly” sounds and looks like jism!!!!) As Glossier Instagrammed above (via this Racked post), in Fifty Shades Darker Anastasia Steele wears Generation G in Jam, which in non-Glossier language means she’s at a masquerade ball busting out a lip tint that, to me, looks like Burt’s Bees, in a color described as a “deep berry magenta.” This is so beautiful, I love it. It all makes so much sense!

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