Taylor Swift and Harry Styles Are Never Ever Getting—Oh, Fuck It

CelebritiesDirt Bag

Nothing gold can stay, including Taylor Swift and Harry Styles’ brief foray into exclusivity. New reports claim that Haylor has ended their 65-day-and-one-Press Baby relationship after a disastrous New Year’s Eve in the British Virgin Islands. As the Daily Mail quaintly puts it, the two “had an almighty row,” after which Taylor got the first flight back to the States on Friday the 4th. Styles, meanwhile, partied in a hot tub on the estate of billionaire Richard Branson (uncle of Kate Winslet’s new husband Ned Rocknroll because everybody at a certain level of wealth is in a SINISTER WEB OF ACQUAINTANCES).

“It all came crashing down very quickly,” an insider told The Sun. They seemed so into each other.”

And this sad picture of Taylor alone on a boat. Cheer up, kid! You have a whole album’s worth of new material now! [The Sun, Business Insider, Daily Mail]

Farrah Abraham, one of the teen moms on Teen Mom, waxed her three-year-old daughter Sophia’s unibrow because she “felt bad for her.” In case that wasn’t depressing enough, she also blogged about it because ugh:

…I could not ignore it, like I know I’ve seen madonna’s duaghter have a stand out uni brow, I remember when I was little I had a unibrow, but I couldn’t remember if there was an age limit, a rule!

And how! As her daughter “freaked out,” Abraham—an aspiring model who has gotten a chin implant, rhinoplasty, and breast augmentation—used wax and then tweezers on the 3-year-old.

The next morning I showed her and told her how well she did and she didn’t even know, She was more intrigued now to be ok with upkeeping her non-unibrow. I could tell she was proud. Ah I feel like a good mom:)

Right you are! I’m sure she gives a shit about facial hair maintenance. [Us Magazine]

What I am about to say might shock you: Justin Bieber has been smoking ganj for quite some time now, because Rich Society Olds staying at the Carlyle Hotel at the same time as El Beebo complained of “a strong smell.”

Some guests at the luxurious Carlyle were asked to change floors because of smoke in the hallways while Bieber was staying in New York to perform at the Victoria’s Secret catwalk show in November, sources told Page Six.

This is exactly how every Edith Wharton book starts. Soon Justin Bieber will catch the eye of betrothed man-about-town Newland Archer, who will be both scandalized and drawn to his iconoclastic ways. [Page Six]

Dina Lohan says that back in 1990, a coke-addled Michael Lohan showed up at their family home in a limo, fresh out of jail, and raped her. “He said, ‘I love you and I want to be with you,’ but then it went dark. It went dark really quick. […] [They] were sleeping, and I just knew I had to stay quiet – I don’t want to wake them.” Nassau County Hospital medical records reflect that Dina did report a rape and was referred to a coalition for abused women, but Dina didn’t press charges because he was already on his way back to a three-year stint in prison. She says: “Lindsay saw her dad abuse me – that’s why she’s so screwed up.” [NYDN]

Heidi Klum, going on with her bad self: “Some people are more experimental in bed and others are more boring. If you are wild and crazy, bring it on so the other person is well aware that you have little devil horns that come out every once in a while… It’s good to make an effort to dress up sometimes, to do things outside of the norm.” DEVIL HORNS. [NYDN]

  • Yayyayay David Bowie will release his first album in 10 years! [Twitter]
  • Kimye spent $11 million on a new family home. [TMZ]
  • And Kim went to dinner in what I think is a dress? [Us Weekly]
  • And who in the actual fuck would put in the effort to buy Khloe Kardashian’s Aerie sports bra on eBay? [Radar Online]
  • Porn star Georgia Jones has moved into Charlie Sheen’s house. [TMZ]
  • A second coroner’s report confirms that Amy Winehouse died of accidental alcohol poisoning. [CBS News]
  • Jason from The Hills (remember him?) is engaged so SRY LAYDEEZ. [Us Weekly]
  • Ben Affleck and Jennifer Garner had a birthday party for their 4-year-old Seraphina. [Us Weekly]
  • Dustin Hoffman would be happy if his daughter Alexandra (Jonah Hill’s ex-girlfriend) would date Daniel Radcliffe. [TV3.ie]
  • Brad Pitt will star in a drama about Pontius Pilate (the guy who killed Jesus. His bad!) [Vulture]
  • Mary J. Blige looks great. [Styleblazer]
  • Victoria Beckham and Geri Halliwell had a falling-out over the Spice Girls’ final hurrah. [Mirror UK]
  • Garrett Hedlund tried to woo now-girlfriend Kirsten Dunst with a romantic 3 AM canoe ride but it capsized and they had to swim back to the shore in “golf pond water.” [Page Six]
  • Gael Garcia Bernal and Diego Luna will soon be teaming up for a threesome say threesome say threesome to direct a movie. [Contact Music]
  • This would be “Mama June” Shannon of Here Comes Honey Boo-Boo dressed as Marilyn Monroe. [Gossip Cop]
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