Was 2011 A Joke?

By Dodai Stewart | December 30, 2011 | 10:30pm

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Was 2011 a joke? Was everything that happened a complete and utter farce? All signs point to yes.

Our planet was a mess. The tsunami in Japan; the floods in the Philippines, the earthquake on the east coast; a deadly tornado in Missouri; wildfires in Arizona, Hurricane Irene; and meanwhile, the global population reached 7 BILLION. In the words of Seth and Amy: Really?!?

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Instead of being completely apathetic or lazily complaining, people unhappy with corporate greed, the flailing economy and the 1% and huge bonuses going to Wall Street bandits took to the streets as part of the Occupy movement. And what happened when these citizens exercised their democratic right to protest? They got arrested or pepper sprayed in the face. What a joke. A joke that became a meme.

The Sandusky debacle lead to a lawsuit filed by a an alleged victim who claimed that the former Penn State football coach sexually abused the victim on more than 100 occasions — and has been abusing boys for more than 30 years. And no one said anything until now? You have to be kidding.

Wait, the State of Georgia killed Troy Davis, are you kidding? For real?

And yet: Zygotes are people, so you can’t kill them. Ba-dum-bum.

Charlie Sheen, who has a history of violence toward women, announced he had tiger blood and waved a machete and claimed to be “winning” and people cheered. That had to be a joke.

Ashton Kutcher simultaneously became the highest-paid TV star and pulled the ultimate prank when he told Demi Moore he’d be faithful. We all got punk’d.

The political arena was full of fucking jokers. Chris Christie? Donald Trump? Let’s get real: The Herman Cain campaign? Sissy pizza? Fucking joke, right? Elaborate ruse? Were we supposed to take any of that seriously?

This joke writes itself: The New York congressman who sent pictures of his dick to ladies online is named Weiner.

Oh, and Hilary Clinton was Photoshopped out of a Situation Room photo, are you fucking serious?

Meanwhile, Ann Coulter was talking about how her blacks are better than your blacks. Comic!

At the box office, Breaking Dawn blew right through the $500 million mark. Half a billion dollars, for a movie in which a vampire procreates and bites the demonic parasitic fetus out of his skeletal bride’s belly and then a man who can turn into a wolf falls in love with said newborn infant. Ludicrous.

You guys. Snooki wrote a book. A book that became a bestseller.

Rebecca Black’s parents paid for her to make a hit song, which in and of itself is ridiculous, but then the absurd track, “Friday,” earned 15 million views on YouTube, and actually made the 13-year-old famous (or infamous).

The Kardashian wedding?!?! One of the biggest jokes of the year. Husband and wife or failed business partners? Speaking of joke marriages: That colonial-themed wedding in South Africa. I mean.

Also ridiculous: Hugh Jackman was in a movie about boxing robots. The way the all-stars season of America’s Next Top Model ended. You have to laugh, or else you’ll cry.

Here’s a 2011 joke, with just two words: Courtney Stodden.

Here’s a 2011 joke, with one word: Qwikster.

Good-bye, 2011. You are easier to deal with when considered a put-on, a prank, a collaborative caper dreamed up but never made real. 2011 was a joke, and when it wasn’t, we turned it into one, or we assumed it was one, like Google Plus.

2011’s one redeeming factor? It wasn’t as bad as 2010.