120 Hilarious Fitness Tips for Women From a Swole Bro
LatestThe world’s foremost expert on glute training, Bret Contreras, has a snazzy new website. One of the articles to kick things off is his “120 Tips on Strength Training for Women.” Cool, I’m a woman, and I want to get stronger; I hope there’s some helpful tips for me! Just a heads up, my enthusiasm is false because it’s well known that the king of glutes can be a real ass when it comes to the ladies.
Some of us have been waiting for his list since he included this gem in his last week’s “random thoughts” blog post:
3. Reconsidering Posting My Training Women Article – What Do You Think?
I’ve been jotting down notes for the past several months in regards to the differences between training men and women. I have 100 observations and would like to post it, however from past experiences I’m pretty sure that a certain number of women would find it to be offensive. I would be sure to mention that these are generalizations and there are of course many individuals who are exceptions to these generalizations, and I think many trainers and coaches would appreciate the attempt at providing honest feedback. However, I don’t want to upset people, or to have to defend my intentions. What do my readers think –- should I post it or leave it be?
Well, first, we should probably be impressed that he referred to us as “women” instead of “females”… so, good job? Of course, this is posted above a stock photo of a woman in a bikini. Instead of, you know, a woman strength training. Already off to a good start.
Bret decided to posted the promised tips, and they don’t disappoint. Or, they really, really do. It sucks because some of his tips aren’t terrible, and might be even helpful if they didn’t come with a side of sexism.
Here’s our favorites:
1. Most women think there’s some magic fitness secret out there and therefore try to juggle every fitness methodology under the sun, which results in being mediocre at a variety of things rather than highly skilled in one or just a few areas.
Women be shopping for magic fitness secrets, ladies amirite?? It’s just something women — and only women! — do.
2. Women absolutely love it when they perform their first legitimate push-up and chin-up, and many love doing “masculine” things in the gym such as pushing sleds.
He’s right, it’s similar to the rush I felt the first time I parallel parked successfully! (It was just last week.) (And I loved it.)
Alternately: Men absolutely love it when they give birth for the first time, and love doing “feminine” things like pushing carriages.
3. However, many women lack the fortitude and dedication to ever see incredible results from lifting due to “being a lifter” rather than “being a student of weight lifting”
You come at the king of glutes, you best not miss. Also, what??