I’m Gooped and Gagged Over the New Gwyneth Paltrow Biography

If you have a hankering for piping hot tea on some alleged tea-bagging, Amy Odell is pouring.

Dirt BagDirt Bag
I’m Gooped and Gagged Over the New Gwyneth Paltrow Biography

Journalist and gossip-monger (complimentary) Amy Odell‘s biography of Gwyneth Paltrow hits bookstores next week and, though I’m sure you’ll have no issue at all imagining that the book is full of bombshells about her boyfriends, brand, and besties, you don’t have to—because many of them are already making headlines.

From the sounds of it, Odell spends significant time on Paltrow’s past relationships, especially the ones with Ben Affleck and Brad Pitt in the 1990s. Spoiler alert: Neither sounded particularly healthy. But that doesn’t mean that there aren’t (alleged) details to giggle about…

According to the book, Paltrow was a big fan of tea-bagging when she was dating Affleck—and we’re not talking about Twinings. “She told Kevyn Aucoin in his London hotel room one day after lunch that she loved when Affleck ‘tea-bagged her,'” Odell reportedly writes of Paltrow’s relationship, which lasted from 1997 to 2000. God forbid a woman tells her makeup artist about her sexual preferences!!

Apparently, Affleck and Paltrow had crazy chemistry (I’ll say…) but the couple just “couldn’t overcome his self-destructive impulses, which may have even included cheating on her.” Affleck, according to Odell, was then “struggling with alcoholism and a gambling problem.” However, infidelity and addiction weren’t the primary source of Paltrow’s friends’ concern about their relationship. Affleck “didn’t always reciprocate her affection” and “at times seemed more interested in playing video games with the guys at his house than being with Gwyneth.” So… he was behaving like every other dude in his 20s.

It gets worse. Before Affleck, there was Pitt (whom Paltrow dated from 1994 to 1997). They were also engaged in 1996 but ended things, because Paltrow reportedly wasn’t ready for marriage at the time. But her reservations didn’t stop her from feeling jealous about Pitt’s subsequent girlfriends—or speaking her mind on his. At a business meeting with Aerin Lauder in 2000, Paltrow popped off: “At one dinner, the two were talking about Brad Pitt,” Odell writes. “According to someone familiar with the discussion, Gwyneth allegedly told her, ‘He’s dumber than a sack of shit.'” I mean…

As of now, Paltrow has yet to comment on the biography, but I am anxiously awaiting a well-timed (and definitely not shady) Instagram post.


Of course Charli XCX and George Daniel DJed their own wedding reception. Who else?? [Vulture]

Zoe Kravitz and Austin Butler are hanging out… [Page Six]

…as are Margot Robbie and Tom Ackerley on a balcony. [People]

Ope-a! A restaurant in Greece is receiving backlash for posting about hosting Kylie Jenner. [Daily Mail]

Here’s a headline for you: “Jane Fonda Says She Wears a Flannel Nightgown to Bed Because She’s ‘Single.'” [Us Weekly]

Anyone else think there’s more to the story about Jennifer Love Hewitt and Sarah Michelle Gellar not speaking after all these years? Especially after [I Know What You Did Last Summer spoiler alert] just starring in the same movie together… [Variety]

Wait, did we know Sia and Harry Jowsey were a thing? [Just Jared]


Like what you just read? You’ve got great taste. Subscribe to Jezebel, and for $5 a month or $50 a year, you’ll get access to a bunch of subscriber benefits, including getting to read the next article (and all the ones after that) ad-free. Plus, you’ll be supporting independent journalism—which, can you even imagine not supporting independent journalism in times like these? Yikes.

 
Join the discussion...