Hopefully, Katy Perry Takes a Page from the Suez Canal Bank’s Rebrand 

It’s been a year for Katy Perry: The breakup with Orlando Bloom, the fling with former Canadian PM Justin Trudeau (which is still very much going strong), a trip to space from hell, and a contentious world tour?! To cap it all off, she just performed at the party of a lifetime: the rebranding of the Suez Canal Bank.

The “bash” took place Tuesday and featured a private Katy Perry concert in front of the Pyramids of Giza, plus a big reveal of a new “visual identity” for the bank and [insert bullshit shareholder jargon here]. Basically, being named after a good old-fashioned trade route is so 19th century, and they needed a party to tell the world they’re embracing some new tech. Woo!

Perry performed 18 songs, including a cover of Whitney Houston‘s “How Will I Know,” and closed out with her favorite presidential election-year hit, “Fireworks.”

Katy Perry performs at the Suez Canal Bank rebrand event in Egypt. https://t.co/vHQunkiKZ3

— Pop Tingz (@PopTingz) December 10, 2025

It’s very LA of the Suez Canal Bank to need a rebranding, but if you recall, the infamous Suez Canal Traffic Jam of 2021 was reputation-ruining. (The bank had no responsibility here—Egypt owns the Suez Canal—but I imagine the name association was devastating.) The canal was blocked for nearly a week by a single container ship, named Ever Given, and in the process, many of us dumb Americans finally learned what the Suez Canal was. It was a monumental time (especially on Twitter).

Yeah sex is good but have you ever got your boat stuck in the Suez Canal and blocked 10% of the world’s trade?

— Dr. Parik Patel, BA, CFA, ACCA Esq. (@ParikPatelCFA) March 25, 2021

I don’t knock Perry for cashing what I imagine was an astronomical check—somebody’s gotta pay for the divorce, and if Jeff Bezos‘ Blue Origin money didn’t cover it, might as well let a bank step up. And after Perry’s disastrous girlboss space ride earlier this year, maybe she can take a page from the Suez Canal Bank and start marketing a fresh narrative for 2026.

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