It went down during Los Angeles station KTLA’s coverage of the television awards. At first, everything seemed fine. Howard was asked if by quitting he meant “for a while or forever.” Howard responded, “For good. I mean, everyone keeps trying to tell me, ‘Don’t say it’s forever,’ but I spent 37 years pretending to be people so that people could pretend to watch and enjoy what I’m doing…”
If he stopped there, fine. Sounds slightly paranoid, but I’m sure he’s right about pretenders. They lurk in every corner. However, he did not stop there.
“…When I’ve made some discoveries in my own personal life with the science that, y’know, Pythagorus was searching for. I was able to open up the flower of life properly and find the real wave conjugations we’ve been looking for for 10,000 years. Why would I continue walking on water for tips when I’ve got an entire generation to teach a whole new world?”
“That’s a big remark,” said KTLA’s Sam Rubin in ironic understatement. “What do you intend to do?”
“Well, let me put it this way,” said Howard. “All energy in the universe is expressed in motion, all motion is expressed in waves, all waves are curves, so where does the straight lines come from to make the Platonic solids? There are no straight lines. So when I took the flower of life and opened it properly, I found whole new wave conjugations that expose the in-between spaces. It’s the thing that holds us together…On Tuesday, when I receive my star I’m going to prove that gravity is only an effect and not a force. I’m putting something on YouTube where I will build the planet Saturn without gravity and build the Milky Way galaxy without gravity.”
Lest you think Howard was referring to procuring an actual star, like the kind made out of plasma that informs its own planetary system—and I completely understand why you would be thinking that given the context—he was referring to the star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame that he is due to receive Tuesday.
And then he complained about never having received an Emmy nomination.
This may be the most outrageous thing I’ve ever seen happen on a red carpet. Give him an Emmy for this?
Howard’s red carpet interview with Extra that same night was slightly less Jaden Smith-on-Twitter-circa-2014-ish. He did, though, mention needing treatment for mental health after playing Lucious Lyon. The interviewer, Jenn Lahmers, laughed. I don’t know that he was joking.
He gave a slightly more straightforward answer to the quitting-acting question that led to him plugging his book (?), 1 X 1 = 2. “I wanna go and promote and teach the new geometry, y’know?” he said. Lahmers totally ignored that and said, “So are you thinking of working on things behind the scenes, or you want to take a break?”Howard kept at it (“We’re the only creatures in the universe that spend all day watching each other”), but it completely slid off Lahmers—watch her just refuse to hear what he’s saying and try again: “And so what were you thinking, I mean, are you going to get more into philanthropy or activism…?”
Yeah.
Here are some of Howard’s teachings: