Nicki Minaj Is Voting For Mitt Romney Because Everything She Raps Is Definitely True

CelebritiesDirt Bag

A Nicki Minaj verse on Lil Wayne’s new mixtape Dedication 4 is whipping all the blogs up into an unnecessary frenzy about her political predilections this morning:

I’m a Republican voting for Mitt Romney/You lazy bitches is f*cking up the economy.

Considering that this is coming from a woman who has (at least) three rap personas, and in her next breath brags about “hanging out with zombies,” this can hardly be considered a genuine endorsement. Could be that the Harajuku Barbie’s fourth persona’s a Republican voting for Mitt Romney, or that she just wanted something to rhyme with “zombie,” or she thinks it’s hilarious that anyone would waste their brainpower on overanalyzing this?

Furthermore, Minaj has previously became entangled with policymakers when she Tweeted angrily about national healthcare following the untimely death of Moesha actress Yvette Wilson from Stage 4 cervical cancer, and it goes without saying that those kinds of concerns don’t really seem to be up Mittens’ alley. [Daily Intel]

Grey’s Anatomy star Jesse Williams and his incredibly piercing eyes wedded his longtime girlfriend Aryn Drake-Lee in Los Angeles this weekend. They met before he got into acting and was a teacher in New York. There was lots of “smiling” and “emotion” and “you could feel the love they had for each other,” said their friend Source. [People]

At the Made in America Festival in Philadelphia this weekend, Beyoncé and Kim Kardashian engaged in some Level 5 Mutual Ignore tactics. Eventually, the two “made small talk in the dressing room, but you could tell Kim was uncomfortable. She clung onto Kanye the entire time and didn’t say much,” according to a source. This follows Kardashian’s multiple rumored attempts to befriend Bey, which were all rebuffed because of course. Man, where’s Kristen Bell’s Gossip Girl voiceover when you need it? [NYDN]

Jay-Z and Coldplay are performing at the Paralympics closing ceremony. [NME]

In an interview with Glamour, Emma Watson discussed how she used to be self conscious about being a 6-10 [US size 4-8] in Hollywood.

“I’ve accepted my body shape more as I’ve got older. I went through a stage of wanting to have that straight-up-and-down model look, but I have curves and hips, and in the end you have to accept yourself as you are. It makes me sad to hear girls constantly putting themselves down. We have these unbelievably high expectations of ourselves… We say that the pressure is coming from men but actually it’s from each other. I think women feel so much pressure these days and it can turn us against each other. But we really damage our own confidence when we put ourselves down, so I try not to.” [Examiner]

The dark maelstrom of Courtney Stodden’s 18th-birthday porn offers came to a head when Doug Hutchison’s girlchildbride Tweeted:

However, Playboy sources have rebuffed Stodden, saying that “doesn’t meet the standards of a Playboy model” and looks too “enhanced.” (In case that wasn’t clear enough, another source added, “We would NEVER take her.”) But wait, it gets more depressing! Stodden’s momager Krista Keller says this is a fabrication and that Playboy has never seen photos of Stodden nude, adding that her daughter has never been surgically enhanced.

My mom recently asked me who Courtney Stodden was, and as far as I got was “She’s… this… person.” [NYDN]

This is barely news, but who the fuck wants to go out on Courtney Stodden? NOT I. Chris Martin is pleased to inform you that Coldplay are the slow jams to which equines fuck. “We heard that there was a guy who couldn’t get his horse to breed properly. He played ‘Fix You’ and sex took place. Now he has the most expensive stud farm in Britain.” [Daily Star]

  • Brad Pitt bought Angelina Jolie a $500,000 shooting range. Stars: just like us! [Ace Showbiz]
  • Bobby Brown’s wife Alicia Etheridge is stable after her seizure. [E! Online]
  • Russell Crowe had to be rescued by the Coast Guard when his kayak drifted out on the Long Island Sound somewhere. [People]
  • A deadly green-fanged spider jumped out of Noel Gallagher’s guitar case on tour and asked him if he’d just stop playing the new shit and play “Wonderwall,” and everyone had to evacuate. [The Sun]
  • Because you weren’t wondering, one of the cherry tomatoes in One Direction, Louis Tomlinson likes girls who play hard-to-get. [Female First]
  • Billie Joe Armstrong was rushed to the hospital in Italy over the weekend and forced to cancel a Green Day concert. [HuffPo]
  • Shia LaBeouf ran his mouth about his split with Carey Mulligan. (“I’m harder on myself and my surroundings than she is, and we had a culture shock in terms of meeting her parents and vice versa. Sensibilities, cultures, histories… [and] she was chasing marriage, family, kids more than I was.”) [Irish Examiner]
  • Lana Del Rey’s into screenwriting now, God help us. [Vulture]
  • Mila Kunis and Ashton Kutcher are looking into getting a rescue dog together (probably a golden retriever). In a mid-level sitcom, Demi Moore and Macaulay Culkin would see the news in a tabloid somewhere and decide to adopt a dog together out of spite and adopt this dog and then fall madly in love. [Now Magazine]
  • Lady Gaga told fans at a concert that she drinks less now than she used to because “she’s not as depressed as before.” [Daily Star]
  • Parents at Suri Cruise’s new school in New York are pissed that their kids will be subjected to the paparazzi storm. Just give them all their own VH1 shows! That’ll quiet them down. [Celeb Dirty Laundry]
  • Kris Humphries isn’t giving up on love. LADIES. [Page Six]
  • Michael Phelps celebrated his swimming retirement in Vegas. Aw, Michael, Ryan Lochte already did Vegas. [People]
  • Here be some pickshurs of Tori Spelling’s new baby Finn. [Us Weekly]
  • Chad Kroeger’s parents were “shocked” when he announced his engagement to Avril Lavigne because they’d never met her (but his mom is a fan). [Us Weekly]
  • Leonardo DiCaprio smokes hookah? Dealbreaker? [Page Six]
  • Alec Baldwin has taken a keen interest in Taylor Swift and Conor Kennedy, it seems. [Page Six]
  • According to Gwen Stefani, having a baby’s pretty easy: it’s when they get to six or seven that’s hard. [Female First]
  • The late Michael Clarke Duncan was gonna marry Omarosa in January. 🙁 [TMZ]
  • And here are a bunch of celebrity Tweets about how MCD was a good dude. [AP]
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