Will Someone Please Allow Koku, Perhaps the Oldest Woman in the World, to Die?


Koku Istambulova is, at 128, the oldest living person, according to the Russian government, and she would desperately like to die.

The news comes from the Daily Mail, which is a publication we must take with several heaps of salt. Koku, the Daily Mail writes, says her advanced age is “God’s will,” she “did nothing to make it happen, and is a “punishment.”

“I have not had a single happy day in my life,” she said.

According to the brief article, which has filled me with powerful love and sympathy for poor, ancient Koku, she was born on June 1, 1889, was 27 when Nicholas II was forced to abdicate as tsar, 55 when World War II ended, was deported by Stalin, and 102 when the Soviet Union collapsed in 1991. Five years ago, Koku’s daughter, who was a more-than-respectable 104-years-old, died.

“I see people going in for sports, eating something special, keeping themselves fit, but I have no idea how I lived until now,” she said. “I have not had a single happy day in my life. I have always worked hard, digging in the garden. I am tired.”

Koku reportedly does not like meat or soup, but does like fermented milk—do with this information what you wish.

To add insult to Koku’s long life of misery, she’s not even in the official roster of old people, since her age isn’t confirmed. This April, the world’s officially oldest person, a 117-year-old Japanese woman named Nabi Tajima, died. The honor has reportedly since gone to another Japanese woman, Chiyo Miyako, now 117.

Today, let us all take time to pray that Koku finds several moments of happiness before her swift and friendly death.

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