We’re so sure you’re planning to rise at 5 am on April 29th and do a real-time mock-up of the Royal Wedding, that we’re going to lay out every bit of the schedule. You’re welcome.
Before things get going, of course, we’ll need to know what to call Kate. Those of you awake and breathlessly clutching a souvenir mug of PG Tips will hear whether the bride’s to be known as “HRH Princess Catherine of Wales”, “HRH Princess William of Wales”, “Duchess of Clarence, Cambridge, Connaught, Sussex,” or plain old Catherine.
8:30 a.m. — Guests arrive at Westminster Abbey. We’d sort of thought they were all VIPs, but apparently it’s all relative. No phones or cameras allowed, for somewhat obvious reasons and to the chagrin of TMZ.
10 a.m. — Actual VIPs arrive. This may or may not include the Beckhams. It will fail to include the Obamas. The feud, you know.
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