Paris Fashion Week Is a ‘Zenon: Girl of the 21st Century’ Mood Board

Stephen Hawking (RIP!) once said that he doesn’t think “the human race will survive the next thousand years unless we spread into space.” Whether or not the human race is technologically, spiritually, or emotionally ready to leave our rock might not matter, because the designers at Paris Fashion Week seem eager to prove we’re at least sartorially prepared. Dress for the planet you want or something.

Designers so far showed Spring/Summer 2024 collections with big geometric patterns and space-blanket-esque fabrics. Colors were bright and neon, and silhouettes were structured into gravity-defying and extraterrestrial-like shapes. There were lots of metal flourishes, at least one literal space helmet, and plenty of squeals from my inner 11-year-old who’s just learned that, in 22 years, wearing her lime green inflatable chair will be considered high fashion. (And there are still four days left of shows!)

Even designers who clearly weren’t going for Supernova-Girlcore (lol sorry) showed collections that could easily outfit anyone in Dune, Star Wars, Star Trek, or The Jetsons. The vibes are very galactic, is my point. But after a few seasons and a couple of years of the goddamn “quiet luxury” trend that has everyone drowning themselves in brain-numbing, yawn-inducing neutrals, it’s really sweet to see some shit that isn’t so fucking boring. (No matter how kitschy, campy, or...out of this world ;)...it is.)

“There is that thing in fashion where happiness is not the right word, because everybody feels like you’re so superficial,” Olivier Rousteing, the creative director of Balmain, told the New York Times of this season’s maximalism. “But what is wrong about being happy? What is wrong with wanting to spread joy?” Absolutely nothing! This is exactly the attitude we should have if humanity ever spreads into space.

Click through for all the looks that have us “caught up in a planetary world.”

The perfect coat for those chilly, -80-degree-Fahrenheit nights on Mars. Also a great dupe of the silver trench Proto Zoa wore while performing the infamous “Supernova Girl.”

When I was 11, I truly believed that this Disney-ified take on spacewear would be what everyone was wearing by the year 2010. I’m so excited that it’s finally happening.

Even Balmain, whose collection was overflowing with polka dots and giant plastic flowers, couldn’t resist including a silver disco-y dress fit for a night of dancing through the stars.

Hard to say if this is designed for humans or the aliens we befriend. Either way, looking forward to our life beyond planet Earth as long as it looks like this.

Space Goth.

Unfortunately, I feel like this literal Zenon dress has spoiled Emily Cooper’s entire wardrobe for Season 4 of Emily in Paris.

The outfit says “I’m in the Matrix” (which is also about space! in a way!) but the hair says “Bride of Heptapod.”

Wait, just kidding, this says “Bride of Heptapod.”

Here’s what our galactic warriors will be wearing. (There won’t be any war in space, but we will need protection from Elon Musk.)

There won’t be royalty in space either (phew!), but if there were, this is what our space gods and goddesses would wear.

Anyone still trying to adhere to a minimalist aesthetic will be allowed to wear this, and only this.

Huge first-day-of-school-in-space vibes! Incredible.

It’s important to keep your eyes covered with colorful, translucent fabric to protect from solar flares and space radiation.

You’ll feel cold (and possibly immediately freeze to death from hypothermia)...but you’ll look hot!

I mean. This is too easy.

I joke, but Anrealage’s show was actually very fucking cool—the clothing was created with fabrics made with photochromy, which changes color under UV light. According to Fashion United, the collection was inspired by the concept of Umwelt, which theorizes that despite living in the same environment, our senses allow us to experience our own unique worlds. Far out! No notes.

Give me astronaut but make it fashion...and also fish bone-y? Sure.