American Idol Is Replacing All Four of Its Judges (with Corn on the Cob!)

By Lindy West | May 11, 2013 | 1:00am

Celebrities Dirt Bag

I wish. Maybe I’m just hungry, but how great would it be if Randy Jackson, Mariah Carey, Nicky Minaj, and that other one all disappeared and were replaced by four buttery corns on the cob with googly eyes stuck on them? I might even start watching that dumdum show. (HAHA LYLAS, CORN, BUT NO I WOULDN’T.)

The panel-scrapping shakeup, which was first reported by The Wrap, follows on the heels of record low ratings, which have left Fox execs scrambling for a bold, show-saving maneuver.

Fox will present its new fall lineup to advertisers on Monday in New York, and we are told the network is expected to announce the departure of all four judges.

“After 12 years of judging on American Idol I have decided it is time to leave after this season,” Randy Jackson told E! News exclusively on Thursday.

Put your picks for new judges in the comments. My second place choice is Bill Murray, Brian Doyle Murray, the other Murray, and an overturned bucket. Ryan Seacrest will be replaced with a grain of rice. Cute! [E!]