David Petraeus Will Plead Guilty to Oversharing with His Mistress 

As recently as last month, Petraius was rumored to be facing felony charges after classified CIA documents and emails were found on Broadwell’s computer. Petraeus has spent his forced retirement puttering around town, making abashed speeches about what a bad boy he is and — until our brother site Gawker reported on it — getting paid a truly eye-popping amount of money to teach not very many hours at CUNY.

According to court documents filed Tuesday in North Carolina’s federal district court, Petraeus has signed a plea agreement that admits he “unlawfully and knowingly” took classified documents and stored them in “unauthorized” locations.” He’s agreed to plead guilty to one count of “unauthorized removal and retention of classified material.” Those charges usually carry the penalty of a fine and a maximum one-year prison sentence, but we’ll just go ahead and guess that prison is unlikely here.

Photo via AP