Was it worth it? Nellie B of The F Bomb affirms that “queers should be able to participate without fear” in prom. However, she also likens the debate over gay students at proms to another high-profile conflict:
Think about prom: Us ladies are supposed to get dressed up and pretty in long dresses, etc., for the most magical night of our lives, spent with the boy (excuse me, partner) of our dreams. We dance and maybe lose our virginities, in the grand tradition of the event. Sound familiar? Prom, and its paraphernalia, sound a lot like marriage.
She continues,
[A]s in marriage, some of us would rather not give hundreds of dollars to the prom-industrial complex-or the marriage industrial complex-and choose to commemorate the culmination of secondary education differently. Some of us like to opt-out of capitalist, patriarchy-based institutions altogether. I’d rather work for queer kids to be safe in school every day, not just on prom night.
Of course, one could argue that there’s no conflict between advocating for freedom to go to prom and fighting for freedom and safety every day. But Nellie B does make a good point: the fight over prom, like that over gay marriage, does touch on “the age-old queer debate of assimilation versus sovereignty.” There’s no question that McMillen should be allowed to attend her prom if she wants to, or that holding a “decoy prom” for her and a few other students was despicable. But as Nellie B points out, participating “capitalist, patriarchy-based” events isn’t necessarily a goal for all gay people (or indeed for all people, generally). She’s a little mean about those who might choose to join McMillen’s fight for prom (“we should all be going to prom too! Like, in solidarity and to be an activist! I’m oh-so-oppressed! Right?”). But the larger point her post raises is a solid one: equal access to problematic institutions like prom and marriage isn’t the end of social change, it’s only the beginning.
Board Denies ‘Sham Prom’ For Lesbian [AP, via MSNBC]
Prom And Assimilation [The F Bomb]
Earlier: Lesbian Teen Sent To Decoy Prom While Other Kids Party At Real One
