Rejoice, for American Horror Story: Freak Show is about to get even better than it was last season. Aside from the fact that Kathy Bates, Jessica Lange and Angela Bassett will be bringing their all to this new season, Patti LaBelle, a woman I have actually seen threaten to cut someone in front of thousands of people, is now on board!
Ms. Patti (or Ms. Patti Patti, as she made us sing at her when I saw her live) will be playing Gabourey Sidibe’s mother and will have a pivotal role as a townsperson who uncovers the deadly secrets of a killer clown, as TV Line reports.
Okay, that sounds pretty scary, but you know Ms. Patti can hold her own. I once saw her live (at a very fancy event at which Minnie Driver was also playing and she was excellent) and Ms. Patti not only called a man onstage, threatened to murder him for trying to upstage her with his smile and sent him off, but gave a five minute speech about how she and Diana Ross came together and made peace at Oprah’s house. “We all pee yellow and shit brown,” Ms. Patti said before launching into a rousing rendition of “Upside Down.” “And if you don’t, you’d better see a doctor.” And then halfway through the song she threw herself onto her stomach and demanded to be lifted up by backup dancers while we all chanted her name. A killer clown? That is nothing.
You’d better watch out, Ryan Murphy: As this chef who isn’t Rachel Ray can tell you, Ms. Patti don’t play.
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