'The Most Disrespectful Brat I've Ever Seen In My Life'


For the past few seasons, the foibles of Jacqueline’s troubled daughter Ashley have vacillated between hilarious and infuriating. The 20-year-old is bristling with entitlement and seems completely confused about the way the real world works, and all of this has provided for some laughable quotes:

On commuting being “hard”:

“The whole process is so annoying. It’s like, I have to wake up early. I have to come into the city. I’m here ’til 6.”

On designing T-shirts:

“When I’m a professional artist, I’m not going to be working with clients. It’s going to be my vision and what I think the general public would like.”

On why she’s really not qualified to do anything:

“Like all my stuff, like all my other stuff, that’s all the stuff I don’t, like, finish, it’s, like, I get bored with it, and, like, I go back to it, but it’s, like, I don’t like deadlines.”

On last night’s episode, Ashley’s father and stepmother flew up from Texas (during this year’s blizzard) to conduct a behavioral intervention on her with her mother and stepfather—four parents all working together amicably to get this kid on track. She showed up late to the meeting, and immediately became frustrated and started rolling her eyes and crying because they dared ask cloying questions like, “What are you plans?” and, “What are your goals?” Also, “We just want to know what you want to be when you grow up.” Ashley’s new life plan—the old one was to move to Manhattan on her parents’ dime—is to move to L.A. and attend beauty school. When she was presented with logistical questions about how she plans to achieve this, she became frustrated and decided to make a dig a her mother, pointing out that at least she doesn’t have a child at 20, which her mother did. The thing is, though, is that the child that her mother had at 20 is Ashley. So perhaps it speaks to many of Ashley’s problems that she thinks that her very existence was perhaps a bad idea.

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