A WalMart deli employee in Gary, Indiana, may be one of the greatest pranksters of the modern age.
The entire series of photos of the staffroom whiteboard was shared by one of Shane’s co-workers, who seems to be a big fan of his work (and why wouldn’t you be?). Here are some more:
Predictably, Redditors have started adding their own suggestions:
“Shane, Stop putting stuffed toys in the display case to show customers what kind of animal the meat comes from. -Management”
“Shane, The five-second rule doesn’t apply to customer purchases. -Management”
“Shane, Stop trying to convince customers that they need to come to at least two meetings and pay dues to buy a club sandwich. -Management”
“Shane, Quit using the intercom to tell customers that we have a sale on organic soylent greens. -Management”
Doubtless, the question will come up as to whether Shane is real or just the creation of a Redditor with too much time on their hands (or just a guy writing the notes himself). Honestly, though, who the hell cares? It’s still hilarious even if he’s not actually getting in trouble with management over this stuff. Anyway, if you’re the sort of person whose only contribution to discourse is to attempt to ruin something joyful just for the sake of your buzzkill boner, just know that no one likes you or cares what you have to say.