Inauguration Day 2025: Jezebel Edition

Follow along (if you want and/or are emotionally capable) as Jezebel liveblogs this dumb, dumb day. 

By Jezebel  |  January 20, 2025 | 11:30am
Photo: Getty Images Politics
Inauguration Day 2025: Jezebel Edition

Welp. Here we are. Donald Trump’s second Inauguration. There’s not much to say except, fuck.

The official swearing-in ceremony begins at 12:00 p.m. ET. Beginning at 11 a.m., the Trumps, former presidents, Supreme Court Justices, and MAGA sycophants all filed into the Capitol Rotunda since Trump said it was too cold to hold the Inauguration outdoors. Michelle Obama is not there.

On Sunday, Trump held a MAGA victory rally??? Then attended a candlelight dinner, where Ivanka Trump and Usha Vance wore custom Oscar De La Renta…so it seems like designers are not worried about dressing MAGA world anymore. Cool! Oh, also, Nelly will be performing at the Inauguration Ball Monday night—but he clarified “This isn’t about politics” and “it is an honor” for him. Very cool.

Also on Sunday, Trump said he plans to sign over 200 executive orders following the ceremony, including announcing the end of birthright citizenship, renaming the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America, and legally defining sex as “male and female.” Should be a great four years!

If you can’t tune out or can’t look away, we made some Bingo cards in an attempt to have a little bit of unhinged fun while we still can. And if you feel like chatting, subscribe to Jezebel and join our Discord. Otherwise, follow along here, and God help us.

Monday, January 20

5:15 p.m.: Rep. Nancy Mace, who’s been tweeting dumb shit all day, just tweeted this dumb photo.

5:05 p.m.: Vivek Ramaswamy has reportedly already stepped down from running DOGE alongside Elon Musk because he’s going to run for governor of Ohio???? OK????

3:20 p.m.: Kim Kardashian posted Melania Trump on her Instagram story and people are annoyed…



3:10 p.m.: Ivanka Trump’s dress color is certainly a choice!


3:00 p.m.: Current mood.

2:59 p.m.: Elon Musk *appeared* to give a Nazi salute during his remarks at the Capital One Arena.

2:40 p.m.: Unfortunately, the clips of Musk standing behind Barron during Trump’s Inauguration speech are hilarious.



2:35 p.m.: Sen. Bernie Sanders (I-Vt.) spotted not talking to billionaires at the Inauguration luncheon.


2:30 p.m.: The New York Times reports that a growing number of Trump supporters are gathering outside a D.C. jail where a dozen Jan. 6 criminal defendants are being held.

2:15 p.m.: In case you missed it! (Good for you!) Here’s a quick recap of Trump’s first speech as our 47th president, in which he basically just seemed to read aloud from the 900-page Project 2025.

2:00 p.m.: LOL to this German translator.

1:50 p.m.: Also, feels offensive to say today, but, Happy Martin Luther King Jr. Day…

1:48 p.m.: Hillary Clinton laughed when Trump said he was going to rename the Gulf of Mexico to the Gulf of America. Same!

1:45 p.m.: In his remarks to the overflow room, Trump said that the 2020 election was rigged and he would have won California this time if it wasn’t for “lost ballots.”

“You know, in places like California, we did great. But when they send out like 38 million ballots, and nobody knows where the hell they’re sending them, but then they come pouring back,” he rambled, while Speaker Mike Johnson nodded along behind him.

1:30 p.m.: Another fun fact is the weather in D.C. today is 21 degrees, but the wind chill makes it feel more like 11 degrees. Obama’s first inauguration, which was held outdoors, was 28 degrees with “wind chill values in the mid teens.” And the last time an Inauguration was moved indoors was for former President Ronald Reagan’s second Inauguration when it was seven degrees with a wind chill that made it feel like minus 20. 


1:25 p.m.: In remarks to the overflow room, Trump says Melania told him to take out any lines about January 6. “I was going to talk about the J6 hostages,” Trump said, before adding, “You’ll be happy because it’s action, not words, that count, and you’re going to see a lot of action.” OK!


1:20 p.m.: Weird if true…

1:15 p.m.: From the archives: Here’s Every Word Jezebel Used to Describe Donald Trump in 2015

1:10 p.m.: Trump forgot????? to put his hand on the bible while taking the oath of office.

1:00 p.m.: Sick! The Proud Boys marched through D.C. while Trump was sworn in.

A group of Proud Boys carrying pro-Trump and anti-antifa signs marched on the streets in Washington as Trump prepared for the swearing-in ceremony at the Capitol Rotunda.

[image or embed]

— NBC4 Washington (@nbcwashington.com) January 20, 2025 at 1:00 PM

12:55 p.m.: Despite reports that the Trumps hate Don Jr.’s new girlfriend, Bettina Anderson, she was at all the pre-Inauguration festivities over the weekend. Though, she was absent from the actual Inauguration ceremony.

12:50 p.m.: There’s no “designated survivor” for today’s ceremony.

12:45 p.m.: Underwood went a cappella for her “America the Beautiful” performance after the sound fucked up.


12:43 p.m.: Disappointing! Carrie Underwood is not wearing an American flag dress.

12:30 p.m.: “This dumbass canal and gulf stuff is like purely from his 5-year-old’s brain.” —Kylie Cheung

12:20 p.m.: The general consensus of Trump’s speech in the Jezebel Slack was, “This is so embarrassing.”

12:17 p.m.: Reminder that Billy Ray Cyrus will be performing at some point today.

12:15 p.m.: Soooo, whitehouse.gov has been updated, and, huge yikes. “The whole page is just a trump fan cam.” —Kylie Cheung

12:14 p.m.: Another tweet for the soul.

12:13 p.m.: Trump addresses the nation, beginning with “The golden age of America begins right now.”

“Actually the ‘golden age of America’ was when we were all on tumblr IMO….”—Kylie Cheung

12:06 p.m.: If you’re playing Jezebel Bingo, after being sworn in, Trump shook Tiffany’s hand and gave Ivanka a kiss on the cheek. Personally, that feels like a snub to me!

12:05 p.m.: “J.D. Vance chose Brett Kavanaugh to swear him in? Gross.” —Susan Rinkunas 

12:00 p.m.: Biden pardons his entire family.


11:55 a.m.: “I continue to believe that Trump didn’t actually want to win the presidency, was surprised when he won, and is currently sitting in the Rotunda looking like he’d rather be sitting at Mar-a-Lago.“—Lauren Tousignant 

11:50 a.m.: Another tweet for the soul.



11:45 a.m.: WTF is this?

11:44 a.m.: Fun fact to remember!

11:38 a.m.: “Trump’s real cabinet”

11:31 a.m.: Melania low-key looks like she’s attending a funeral, but also, “is always going to serve cunt, unfortunately.” —Audra Heinrichs 

11:17 a.m.: “We knew in advance that Michelle Obama was not going to attend but Obama walking through that doorway alone was giving such strong Divorced Dude energy…” —Kylie Cheung

11:11 a.m.: This man is such a dumbass. Also, his wife is very notably not there.

11:08 a.m.: A funny tweet for the soul.

11:00 a.m.: If you’re playing Jezebel Inauguration Bingo, Mark Zuckerberg’s wife, Priscilla Chan, unfortunately, showed up. Sorry. “You should leave your husband for listening to Joe Rogan’s podcast let alone going on it for 3 hours.” —Kylie Cheung

10:45 a.m.: Bing Bong!

10:30 a.m.: The Bidens and Trumps had their little pre-Inauguration tea.

10:00 a.m.: Just in case you forgot who’s being credited with Trump’s victory, it’s Susie Wiles. 

9:30 a.m.: President Joe Biden says See Ya.

 

 
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