Server Posts Epic Facebook Response After Customer Harasses Her
Every server who’s seen the abuse heaped on themselves and their co-workers has wanted to see a horrible customer get their just comeuppance through a public shaming. Today, our prayers have been answered, because someone did just that.
Laura Ramadei, a server and bartender in New York City, was at the end of her rope after five years’ experience in the industry and more than her share of terrible customers. So when a New York finance bro named Brian Lederman allegedly sexually harassed her, it was the last straw:
You came into the restaurant where I work and ordered a Stoli on the rocks. When I asked you and your companion if you’d be eating, or needing anything else from me, you put your hand – ever so gently – ON MY ASS and asked if you could take me “to go”. When I immediately stepped away and said “Sorry, what?” you probably gathered that I was and am not receptive of such advances from customers. We were in a family-friendly restaurant, around 6:30pm, and I was wearing a loose-fitting, long sleeve shirt, jeans, and no makeup…so I’m not sure where the confusion arose as to what kind of service you were being provided.
Fortunately for the human race and unfortunately for Lederman, a quick google search of his name (which was on his credit card) turned up where he works (Swiss Performance Management and Truehand AG, in Investment Management — SHOCKER that Lederman is a finance bro), and Laura, a graduate from NYU with honors, unleashed a brutal yet somehow polite and reasoned response to Brian Lederman and everyone like him along with a photo of his receipt:
I deal with incredible amounts of entitlement, condescension, and drunk nonsense. And at a bar, it is impossible to ignore the fact that misogyny is alive and well. I can’t tell you how many times people have treated me horribly and I’ve memorized or photographed the names from their credit cards, fantasizing about internet revenge. But every time I’ve been tempted in the past (even after verbal attacks, physical affronts, or sexual harassment) I’ve stopped myself and let it go.
So congratulations, Brian! You’ve done it! You broke this tired ass camel’s back. And though this is obviously a public shaming, I truly don’t mean this as an attack. Maybe – just maybe – via the intimately connected internet world, my post will reach you, and you’ll learn something about how hurtful and upsetting a small comment or gesture might be. Or at the very least, maybe a Facebook passerby will read this and more deeply consider how they treat women, how they treat servers, and/or how they treat other people in general.
I sympathize more than slightly with Laura more than a little bit here, as I’ve come perilously close to doing this in the past (the only thing that stopped me was fear of losing my job). What’s more, when I talked to her about the whole incident, Laura told me that as far as she could tell, Lederman wasn’t drunk; this just appears to be what he’s like when sober. Fun times.