Don’t pay attention to the lyrics of Ariana Grande’s new single “Break Free” (which even she knows are meaningless) because the video for it far more out of control and out of this world than any world ever imagined by a human being. Ariana even has an alien sidekick – an artist known as “Zedd” – featured on the track.
We should have expected it from the Star Wars-fonted lyric video she released previously, but this new video starts off with a disclaimer:
What you are about to witness is scientifically authentic. It is just one step ahead of present day reality and two steps ahead of present day sexiness. Prepare yourself to attempt to conceive an inconceivable outer space adventure. Brace yourself for something so fantastically fantastical you’ll soil yourself from intergalactic excitement.
OKAY HERE WE GO THEN PREPARED FOR SOILING.
We start off on a different planet where people are bored and trapped in cages.
In walks Ariana with some sort of power symbol, ready to free them from the monotony of their boring lives, much as she does with her music for us humans here on earth.
She also has some stuff on her face that wouldn’t put her out of place at Coachella.
Soon Ariana returns to her ship to shed her cocoon of constraining clothes that she wasn’t wearing before.
At some point a man who looks sort of familiar constrains her in a firey pit of hell. Reminds me of that scene from Aladdin.
Pause to apply some intergalactic lipstick.
Pause for the required Beats break and party as the planet has been conquered, I guess. (Zedd, is that you?)
Pause for Beats Break II: Kiss an Elephant Alien Edition
BYEEEEEE. [Flips hair, shoots missiles out of breasts.]