Kim Kardashian’s Actors on Actors Interview Made Me (& Chloë Sevigny, Probably) Want to Die

There were plenty of viable options as to who could've been paired with Sevigny. But we got a scab who cites The Notebook as peak cinema.

Celebrities
Kim Kardashian’s Actors on Actors Interview Made Me (& Chloë Sevigny, Probably) Want to Die

When Variety announced that Kim Kardashian was selected to participate in its Actors on Actors series in May, the outrage was swift. And the fact that she—and her handful of actual acting credits—would be paired with the Academy Award-nominated It Girl eternal, Chloë Sevigny? Well, the discourse was discourse-ing.

This week, their conversation—which the Daily Beast deemed a “smooth-brained delight“—arrived and it’s bad, folks. The very opposite of a smooth-brained delight, to be exact, at least in my opinion.

Among the topics of conversation are their respective roles in Ryan Murphy’s American Horror Story and Feud: Capote vs. The Swans, taste in film, and Kardashian’s penchant for collecting (and ruining) much more interesting famous people’s clothes. Let’s start with the latter, shall we?

“I’m a big fan in owning memorabilia, or pieces with energy from people that I love. I wore Marilyn Monroe’s dress once, and I just took it all in,” Kardashian said as if the entirety of the world didn’t see the strain the tailored-to-its-original-wearer gown sustained taking all of (a proudly over-exercised and starved) Kardashian in. “And I actually bought a watch of Lee Radziwill—or Jackie’s, but Lee had it. I would always probably just take a moment and be like, ‘This is so fucking cool to have her pieces!'”

Sevigny, perhaps one of the most pre-eminent sartorial icons in recent history, responded by noting the accountability one should assume in spending one’s unethical billions buying up priceless pieces in history.

“It’s cool! But there’s such a level of responsibility to, obviously, her memory and her friends and family,” she pointed out. Subtle, girly! Kardashian, of course, didn’t respond to this and the conversation continued to go full steam ahead.

Later, when Sevigny prompted Kardashian on whether she’s a cinephile, she cited…Clueless, The Notebook, and Troop Beverly Hills. Now, I don’t consider myself a film snob, and to be clear, I think Troop Beverly Hills deserved Oscars. However, Kardashian’s reason for loving it is—in part—its nostalgia for a simpler time when one could “drive down in a Rolls-Royce in Beverly Hills.”

“All the shopping bags out?” she added hypothetically, referencing one particular scene. “You’d get robbed.”

Sevigny, to her credit, replies very politely: “I love a good popcorn movie.” Translation: Just sign a Marvel contract already, you scab.

“In high school, I got into the more independent scene,” Sevigny goes on to explain to a largely expression-less Kardashian. “I was also just drawn to certain actresses, like Mia Farrow and Anna Magnani, the great Italian actress. And Gena Rowlands. I was really drawn to just these women who were just powerhouses.”

“For me, it was mostly about the glam,” Kardashian answers. “When I look back at films with Ava Gardner, I just am always looking into their hair and their makeup, and what they’re wearing. I just remember writing down the actresses’ names and wanting to get on my computer and search and see what they were wearing and who did their hair and makeup back then.” OK!

Other highlights include Kardashian’s next role (a divorce attorney inspired by Laura Wasser as if Laura Dern didn’t already do that in Marriage Story), and Sevigny’s complex relationship with fame in the early aughts to which Kardashian couldn’t relate (“When I had started acting, I was like, ‘The moment I appear in People magazine, I’m going to quit acting'”).

It all culminates in this awkward goodbye:

KARDASHIAN: It was so much fun seeing you again.

SEVIGNY: You too. See you at the Met!

KARDASHIAN: Yes, I’ll be there.

SEVIGNY: This might come out after that, though.

KARDASHIAN: That’s OK!

The conversation was, in essence, the kind I’d liken to one I’ve had many a time with an influencer-adjacent in the bathroom of an establishment I can’t afford. I greet her lame jokes with gracious laughter, compliment her perfume then thumb the name of her perfume into my notes app, only to never look at it again. And as soon as she leaves, I offer a silent prayer to whoever’s up there that my brain didn’t just lose another wrinkle.

1 Comment
Oldest
Newest
Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Share Tweet Submit Pin