Can Someone Give Stephen Miller a Fucking Xanax

The only thing worse than watching Stephen Miller's face during a Fox News rant would be watching it as he pops an aneurysm.

By Lauren Tousignant  |  April 24, 2025 | 3:00pm
Screenshot: Fox News Politics
Can Someone Give Stephen Miller a Fucking Xanax

The only thing Stephen Miller—President Trump’s Deputy Chief of Staff—loves more than being a white nationalist who hates immigrants is going on Fox News and having meltdowns over the fact that not everyone is a white nationalist who hates immigrants.

On Tuesday night, Miller went on Fox News to rant to Sean Hannity about “communist” judges and the millions and millions of terrorists that they’ve let stay in the U.S. “This is the choice facing every American: Either we all side and get behind President Trump to remove these terrorists from our communities, or we let a rogue, radical-left judiciary shut down the machinery of our national security apparatus,” he said.

Granted the “radical-left judiciary” he’s so angry about are mostly conservative judges who’ve ruled that Trump can’t just round up people and deport them becuase he thinks maybe they’re bad. Regardless, by the time he’d gotten to that portion of his rant, he’d gotten himself so riled up, I thought his eyeballs might pop out.

In no way am I concerned about Miller’s health, but if he’s going to insist on doing these rants live on-air two or three times a week, can someone start giving him some benzodiazepines? The only thing worse than having to look at Stephen Miller’s face mid-rant would be having to look at Stephen Miller’s face as he pops a dozen blood vessels as his brain explodes.

Last week, Miller nearly blew up all over the screen while yelling to Fox News’ Bill Hemmer that Kilmar Abrego Garcia’s “only options in life are to be deported to El Salvador or to be deported to some other country.” He also, of course, accused the media of lying about the facts of Abrego Garcia’s case and insisted that bringing him back to the U.S. would be an “unimaginable invasion of El Salvador’s sovereignty.” He was so angry at one point, his voice cracked. Hemmer, for his part, attempted to reel him in, saying, “You haven’t even allowed me to ask a question.” The week before, Miller spoke with Fox News’ Martha MacCallum and threw a temper tantrum while trying to defend Trump’s tariffs.

And on Tuesday, he yelled to Laura Ingraham about how Abrego Garcia “received more due process than almost any American citizen who was been perscuted by their government over hte last four years, who are jailed, deprisoned, and deplatformed by the Biden administration.” I have zero idea what he’s talking about, but his grating, infuriated voice literally made me want to yell back, Dude, she agrees with you, chill. 

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