Bad Personal Grooming Advice For Men

In the past few weeks I’ve seen two advice columns exhort men to manscaping. Granted, this “advice” came from Cosmo and Ashley Dupre, respectively. But the rationale seemed problematic.

Yes, one could do worse than to ignore both these sources in questions of grooming and life in general. But together, they pointed to a weird trend. Because whatever your personal feelings about personal grooming, societal pressure shouldn’t be part of the equation. Basically, what both these sages said was: yes, a guy has to groom, or trim, or [insert creepy-cute euphemism of the Cosmo varietal] — because you wouldn’t want an ungroomed woman, would you? Here’s Dupre’s response to a guy who asked about the necessity of waxing:

Yuck! I keep hearing from guy friends that when they’re in locker rooms, they see these young, good-looking guys with full-on, untrimmed hair down there. I mean, is this look coming back or are these guys really that clueless about proper grooming techniques? These are good-looking guys too, so I’m sure they’re hooking up. It baffles me that rather than use the technology we’re blessed with today (electronic clippers) they decide to go caveman on us. When I’m in the locker room, I see young women with full-on hair down there, too! Personally, that’s not my style. I could never allow myself to completely grow it out. I don’t think it’s fair to the person I’m hooking up with.

I’ll forebear making a Spitzer remark, but most of us think a naked body is quite gift enough for our partners. And clearly, she’s not alone: Cosmo’s “Ask a Guy” advised one woman to present it to her “man” this-a-way: how’d he like it if she was unkempt?

I should hope he’d like it just fine. Not only are plenty of us genuinely blase about our partners’ grooming (cleanliness aside), but I’d feel genuinely angry if I saw the word “yuck” applied to a natural, unmanicured vadge. And I agree with them on one head: what’s good for the goose is — well, you know what I mean. Nobody should be held to arbitrary standards because the human body is “yucky.” If someone prefers one mode of grooming, or is humoring a partner — sure, do what you want. But in answer to your questions, guys, what you “owe” another person in the sack is not for a random advice columnist to answer. Oh, and remind me never to undress in front of her.