Adele’s Latest Album Is a Sucker-Punch, Give Us Wine

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Y, the duchess of Bri’ish ballads just read me to filth: “To Be Loved,” Adele – The drought of Tottenham’s resident weepy girl has at long last come to an end with the release of 30—a mere six years after her last album (I haven’t been counting, I’m not tweaking, I do not need to be checked on, I am fine). And blessed be the industry exec who said, “Baybe. It’s time.” “To Be Loved” is the kind of song perpetually depressed people like me listen to with the blinds closed and rock back and forth letting lyrics like “I’m as lost now as I was back then” seep into our little black hearts. It’s everything we’ve been demanding of her: stabby reflections like “It’s about time I face myself, all I do is bleed into someone else,” piano keys, and some sing-yelling at the end. It’s old Adele meets wiser Adele meets someone who just skipped off the Goop cruise in the bliss of a spiritual awakening. I’ll come out of my room after a dozen or so more listens. – Emily Leibert

Put it on your workout playlist: “Bet It,” Cardi B – This is very clearly a song for a soundtrack. The movie isn’t out yet so I haven’t seen it, but when I hear this beat I can almost see the Halle Berry training montage that it’ll likely be accompanying. As a stand-alone song, it’s fine and filled with some very good Cardi B puns that will give you a chuckle as you blast this during your winter running sessions. – Shannon Melero

I mean, sure: “t r a n s p a r e n t s o u l (Remix Visualizer) ft. Kid Cudi, Travis Barker,” Willow: Okay, I’m on the record for loving this song and Willow’s pop-punk era in general, but I also feel like a new video or remix for this song comes out every month! Kid Cudi’s addition to the track is… fine. Nothing to really call home about, and while I like Kid Cudi, his cadence had me wishing it was Lil Nas X on the track instead. But, hey, no complaints. —Ashley Reese

I’m interested: “BABY TEETH,” Alice Glass: I’ll admit, I haven’t kept up with Alice Glass’s post-Crystal Castles solo career much, but I want the best for her, especially following the hell she allegedly went through with her CC bandmate. Luckily, “BABY TEETH” is a nice reintroduction if you’re already into Glass’s brand of chaotic electro music. The accompanying music video is as morbid as the first couple of lines of the track: “Whatcha thinking bout boy?/Are you picturing my insides outside of me?” So if you’re sensitive to grotesque imagery, definitely listen to the song on a streaming service instead. —Ashley Reese

 
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