Welcome back to Barf Bag.
Conservatives love to accuse Democrats of having Trump Derangement Syndrome, or a reflexive negative reaction to anything that Donald Trump does, but this week’s dust-up over a social media post proves that they are their own kind of brainwashed.
On Thursday, Former FBI Director James Comey posted a now-deleted photo on Instagram showing seashells forming the numbers “8647” on sand, with the caption “Cool shell formation on my beach walk.” Trump is the 47th president, and “86” in food-service lingo means refusing to serve certain customers or removing an ingredient or menu item. Merriam-Webster notes that the phrase, which may have come about as rhyming slang for “nix,” now also means “to throw out” or “to get rid of.”
The numbers “86 47” are the kind of thing you’d see on a sign at a march protesting Trump policies, or at a pro-impeachment demonstration. People do not commonly use “86” to talk about death or murder; meanwhile, an actual, established slang code for murder is “187.”
Yet none of this stopped lawmakers and Trump appointees from falling over themselves to defend the president in what I will call Trump Ass-Kissing Syndrome or Dear Leader Syndrome. Yes, Trump faced an assassination attempt in July 2024, and another gunman hid in the bushes at Trump’s Florida golf club in September, but this seashell photo is not evidence of some sort of conspiracy.
Multiple GOP Senators claimed that Comey was calling for Trump’s assassination, including Tommy Tuberville (Ala.), Tom Cotton (Ark.), Josh Hawley (Mo.), Marsha Blackburn (Tenn.), and Mike Lee (Utah).
Secretary of Homeland Security, and woman who wants money for a new plane, Kristi Noem, wrote on Twitter Thursday: “Disgraced former FBI director James Comey just called for the assassination of POTUS Trump. DHS and Secret Service is investigating this threat and will respond appropriately.” Director of National Intelligence Tulsi Gabbard (lol) wrote on Twitter that Comey “just issued a call to action to murder the President of the United States.” She went further on Fox News, claiming that Comey was “issuing a hit” on Trump.
Comey said that, basically, he figured “47” referred to Trump but didn’t think “86” had anything to do with violence, and, well, most people don’t! “I posted earlier a picture of some shells I saw today on a beach walk, which I assumed were a political message,” Comey said in a statement. “I didn’t realize some folks associate those numbers with violence. It never occurred to me, but I oppose violence of any kind so I took the post down.”
Trump appeared on Fox News Friday morning and claimed Comey knew “86” means assassination. “He knew exactly what that meant. A child knows what that meant,” he said. “If you’re the FBI director and you don’t know what that meant, that meant assassination.”
After reading all this nonsense about seashells, I would like to bury myself in the sand with a tropical drink.
Presenting: 2028 Watch, Beard Edition.
Trump-related barf:
- After Elon Musk spent nearly $300 million to get Trump elected, federal investigations into his many companies have been dropped or halted, and the people looking into him have been fired. Huh!!! [NBC News]
- Stephen Miller is nominally the deputy chief of staff for policy, but he has much, much more power than that title implies, both inside the White House and the Department of Justice. One could argue that he is the shadow president. [NBC News/New York Times]
- The Trump administration resumed collections on defaulted student loans, meaning that people over 65 who still have debt will soon see their Social Security checks being garnished. [Associated Press]
- Meanwhile, Attorney General Pam Bondi, the nation’s top lawyer, sold between $1 million and $5 million worth of shares in Trump’s media company the day he announced sweeping tariffs. The stock market tumbled the next day. Very legal and very cool. [ProPublica]
- Transportation Secretary Sean Duffy insisted that flying through Newark Airport was still safe amid radar system outages, but later told a conservative radio host that he changed one of his wife’s flights to avoid the hub. He claimed it was merely for scheduling purposes. [The Guardian]
- In 2018, the Trump administration denied Maine’s request to ban soda and candy purchases with SNAP funds; now Health Secretary Robert F. Kennedy Jr. wants to do it nationwide. [NOTUS]
- Trump’s absurd military-and-birthday-parade may cost as much as $45 million. [CNBC]
Non-Trump barf:
- California Gov Gavin Newsom (D), rumored 2028 candidate and reactionary podcaster, urged cities and counties in the state to ban homeless encampments after a Supreme Court ruling upheld such a law. I’ll let The Onion take it from here: “Gavin Newsom Sits Down For Podcast With Serial Killer Who Targets Homeless.” [Associated Press]
- Columbia University suspended students who were studying in a library when pro-Palestine protestors occupied it, even though they had nothing to do with the demonstration. [The Intercept]
- Former Obama staffer and Chicago Mayor Rahm Emanuel continues to threaten to run for president. [Chicago Sun Times]
- The failed Senate campaign of Kari Lake is still aggressively fundraising to pay off more than $1 million in debt, and a lot of people who donated this year want their money back. [The Intercept]
This has been your weekly Barf Bag, thanks for reading!
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Still here. Still without airbrushing. Still with teeth.
