I don’t know who died and made Chloe Sevigny (easily the worst part of Brown Bunny, a movie in which every element was a race to the bottom) the authority on what’s cool, but in her latest V magazine interview, she made some disparaging comments about Jennifer Lawrence, America’s best friend and all-around awesome person whose personality is not at all contrived and who once legitimately fell at The Oscars.
Being a fall truther (the first fall was fake, the second was real), I’m not J-Law’s biggest fan but I am even less of a fan of Chloe Sevigny of whom I am such a non-fan that I would safely consider myself a hater (Other actors I am a hater of: Julia Stiles — don’t get me started, Ben Foster, Ashton Kutcher, etc.). Therefore, I feel that it is my sworn duty to let it be known that her comments about Jennifer Lawrence being too annoying are not only unwelcome but offensive to the public at large.
Sevigny, who is a walking nightmare most famously portrayed by actor Drew Droege, said this to V regarding great actresses:
She continues, “I love when a movie star is a great movie star. I think Angelina Jolie is a great movie star. I don’t think I can be that, or just be an actor. I don’t think I have the charisma. Which is probably why I never reached another level. I like Emma Stone. Whenever she’s herself, she’s really cute. Jennifer Lawrence I find annoying. Too crass.”
I get that she’s an artist and all, but I’m pretty sure that Chloe Sevigny herself is pretty crass and annoying. You know why? Because calling out random people as crass and annoying is more crass and annoying than swearing in public and acting kooky. Also, people who star in films with Vincent Gallo (YOU KNOW WHAT YOU DID IN THE NAME OF ART, SEVIGNY!) shouldn’t throw stones. [Gossip Cop]
Robin Thicke has been ruled a relentless rip-off. The son of Alan Thicke, who had a hit with last year’s rapey “Blurred Lines” will, along with producer Pharrell Williams, have to pay $7.3 million to Marvin Gaye’s family now that a jury has agreed with the fact that the song’s catchy tune was plagiarized from Gaye’s hit “Got to Give It Up.” T.I., who lent his rap skills to the song, has not been charged with wrongdoing and will not be giving up any of his considerable wealth to Gaye’s estate — which is good, because entering Iggy Azalea into all those pageants has got to cost a lot of money. [TMZ]
Mark-Paul Gosselaar’s acting career may be ailing, but the ZILF’s bush is very, very healthy. Here’s a picture. (Please just scroll by if you’ve already seen it/can’t appreciate what I am giving you here. This is very important news, okay?)
- Molly Ringwald is going to be interviewing Judy Blume in June and I really hope she grills her about all those sex scenes in Wifey. I’m not the only one who found that book a little “extra,” am I? I bought the large print edition at Goodwill and really wish I hadn’t chosen to read it on the bus. Ringwald also took a photo with Carly Rae Jepsen, whom she referred to as “a younger version of me.” An informal poll of the Jezebel writers concluded that we “did not see it.” [Twitter]
- 80’s pop sensation Tiffany ate rabbit for the first time ever in her life this week! That’s kind of weird, considering she was an 80’s pop sensation and probably had lots of opportunity to eat exotic foods. I’ve eaten alligator before (at a Guy Fieri joint) and I’m not even famous! I just had $19.99 and an adventurous appetite! Incidentally, when you look up “Tiffany Twitter,” the first thing that pops up is Tiffany&Co, which I thought was Tiffany’s new band or something, but I was wrong. Just FYI. [Twitter]
DeborahDebbie Gibson is retweeting a user named “SmegmaCheez” and wants you to know that if you want anything signed, you can send an SASE to PO Box 1154, Katy, TX 77492. I don’t know if I’ve mentioned this, but Debbie Gibson’s “Lost In Your Eyes” is going to be the first song played at my weddingover my partner’s dead body. [Twitter]- Eva Mendes says therapy is grrrrrrreat! Agree. I hope my therapist is reading this because I totally missed our appointment today to be here with you guys! Let me know if it was worth it! (And, if so, let me work it, put it down flip it and reverse it.) (Sorry, had to.)[Page Six]
- 50 Cent’s 2-year-old son is a model, making more money than you and me put together! [E!]
- I forgot to wear socks today and I don’t know why I’m still so upset about it.
- Jana Duggar wants to live life on her own, enjoy a fucking moment’s peace to take a shower and shit. Radar says “the fairytale’s over,” but it sounds like it’s actually just beginning! [Radar]
- Ashton Kutcher said something about diapers but I only read the headline. [People]
- Selena! Gomez! New !Video! ALERT! [Just Jared]
- Everyone’s real sore about something that happened on reality TV’s biggest romance show for love. [Dlisted]
I’ve been up for 27 hours, so here’s what everything looks like to me right now.
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