Life’s full of mysteries; on Thursday, Melania Trump returned from her husband’s impromptu visit to the troops in Iraq and descended from Air Force One wearing what appears to be a pair of leather pants. But are they?
They are impressively close to the color of her skin, as well as her shoes. Some say they’re pants; some say she was just wearing a miniskirt. As Oprah once said, what is the truth? A few potential answers:
- Those are her real legs
- Those are her Barbie legs
- She’s wearing leather pants
- She’s wearing no pants because it’s 2019 (basically) and women can do whatever they want. Amirite, ladies!
- She’s wearing no pants, but it was an accident; she forgot them
- Too much Jergen’s self-tanner. It’s December, beyotch!
- Melania is actually 50 percent caramel candy
- That’s not Melania. That’s Blake Lively character-acting and/or trying out a new fashion thing for 2019
- Melania descended from a long line of elves on the North Pole and recently reconnected with her relatives
- Matching her pants to her hair and skin tone, Melania is slowly working on becoming monochromatic, which is halfway to her longterm goal of becoming invisible
- Melania is Willy Wonka, left her hat on the plane
- This is actually a test for color-blindness, the pants are red and you failed; you should consult with a doctor
- She just came from horseback-riding, left the horse on the plane
- We’re all stupid and the end of the world is invariably coming soon
GET JEZEBEL RIGHT IN YOUR INBOX
Still here. Still without airbrushing. Still with teeth.
