Behold, the future! The year is 2090 and it has a message for you: “You’ve wasted your time on earth.”
Tonight’s episode of Jeopardy was abysmal, pathetic and every other adjective that you could use to describe something bad. Not only did Alex Trebek actually admit that it “wasn’t one of the show’s best episodes,” but Final Jeopardy was an epic shitshow, with its final competitor losing even though she had no one to compete against even getting the final question wrong [Ed note: Corrected and clarified 2:29 pm 3/13]. And then she was thrown into an arena to be eaten by wild dogs made with the DNA of all the former losers (including my friend Eamon who almost crushed the entire thing a few weeks back) (Sorry, dude!).