Let Us Take Comfort In This Photo of Jeb Bush Standing Alone in an Empty Airport 


Above is a photo of Jeb “Heb” Bush standing alone at Miami International Airport, the great quandary of life pressing down on him on all sides with the brunt force of an industrial-scale trash compactor. How I have missed this devastating man.

Let’s take a moment, please, to remember happier times (happier on our end, to be clear):

Do you recall when, a mere four months ago, before he suspended his historic failure of a presidential campaign, Jeb switched to contacts and made a slightly offensive joke about it that no one laughed at? Or a few weeks earlier, when Jeb implored an audience to “please clap”? Or how about one day before that, when he awkwardly informed a young voter: “I want to be your first”? Or when he promised to “whup” Hillary Clinton, or when JebBush.com redirected to Trump’s website, or when the man introducing Jeb at a rally accidentally called him “George”?

And who can forget that fateful day when Jeb delivered, unprompted, this shriek of dynastic anguish heard ‘round the world: “I love my mother more than my dad”?

It appears that not much has changed. What a relief to see that no matter what happens in this crazy game called life, Jeb Bush will continue to be profoundly uncomfortable.

Inline Feedbacks
View all comments
Share Tweet Submit Pin