Please Allow Rudy Giuliani's Delightful Neighbor to Gleefully Tell You About the F.B.I. Raid on His Home

My favorite part of any Law & Order episode is when detectives question a neighbor or bystander about the perp or the crime. In this four-second snippet, the New Yorker being questioned by the police does not know anything, has not seen anything, but adds unmistakable New York City ambiance to the episode.

The neighbor of one Rudolph W. Giuliani seems like she was ripped straight from one of the “ripped from the headlines” episodes of my favorite long-running crime procedural, running out of her apartment to tell reporters that she knows nothing about what the FBI was looking for in Giuliani’s apartment and looking fucking fantastic while doing it.

“The funniest thing is, my ex-husband called me and said, ‘Have you seen what’s going on?’” the neighbor, Michele Herbert told reporters. “He said look out your window.”

Not to quibble with Herbert, with whom I’ve fallen in love based on less than a minute of video, but that’s merely a funny thing about this scenario. The main funny thing is, the feds are finally coming for Rudy Giuliani: executing a search warrant for his Park Avenue apartment at 6 A.M. and removing cell phones and other electronic devices, likely in connection to his alleged attempts to dig up dirt on Hunter Biden on behalf of his buddy Donald Trump.

Perhaps the main funny thing is that after years of being shielded from prosecution by Trump’s other buddy William Barr, former U.S. Attorney General, it’s now open season on Giuliani. After Giuliani helmed team Trump’s desperate grasp to retain the presidency by alleging non-existent voter fraud, Biden’s U.S. Attorney General pick, Merrick Garland, seems insistent on closing the loop. Or maybe it’s the fact that after years as New York’s “law and order” mayor, cruelly and brutally propping up a cruel and brutal NYPD, Giuliani himself is likely headed for the very jails he unjustly filled up.

There’s too much here to pick one thing, but Herbert is a gem and should play herself when this story gets the Law & Order treatment.