Rihanna Says She's a 'Square' Who Never Has Sex

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Rihanna “Sex Plane” Lastname says that, despite her hard-partying image, she’s recently become a “square” who spends most of her time folding her hankies and playing clothes-on cribbage.

The provocative star, 25, claims she no longer fancies hitting the club scene because it’s “boring”.
“Recently I’ve become a square,” she says.
“I hate partying. I don’t know if it’s my heels – I don’t like standing up in my heels for hours. I don’t know if it’s that, but I’ve been so bored of it.”
Could this be the same woman who just this week regaled her Twitter followers with the (very) ­intimate X-rated details of a live sex show she attended in Phuket, Thailand?
“I don’t know if it’s because it’s the same music every night – maybe we need some more DJs,” she adds – which must be music to the ears of her dance floor superstar chums David Guetta and Calvin Harris.
However, perhaps the problem is too much of a good thing…
Last year, Rihanna was pictured out on average once every three nights.


“I love what I do and I’ve got a lot to celebrate,” she continues.
“So you’ll catch me celebrating every once in a while, because I work hard.”
But quizzed by Alan Carr on the 100th edition of Chatty Man tomorrow night, Chris Brown’s raunchy ex seems to say that cutting down on her nights out has left her a little lonely as she hasn’t had sex for quite a while.
She tells him: “I am such a bootleg rock star, I do nothing, literally. I’m embarrassed to say that actually. That’s so disgusting. That’s f****** pathetic.”
She adds: “I tell you, I’m a bit of a square recently. Don’t feel bad for me, I’m good.”


Dita Von Teese is suing her insurance broker von teese over Hurricane Sandy.

Dita just filed the suit against Momentous Insurance Brokerage, claiming one of her strip shows in New York was canceled last October due to the superstorm … and Momentous failed to get her the appropriate insurance to cover her expenses.
Dita claims she spent $96,920 in prep costs for the show (props, costumes, hotel accommodations, etc.) and it all went down the drain when the show was 86d.
According to the lawsuit, filed by her attorney Keith Fink, Dita says she should have had something called non-appearance insurance, which covers natural disasters like storms, but Momentous didn’t get it for her. And even more infuriating… Dita says the coverage is standard in the entertainment business.

Give Dita her money von teese back!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! [TMZ]

Britney Spears says she’s going to do “as much as humanly possible” to actually sing in her Las Vegas singing show. Her manager says:

“She’s going to be singing live. She does choreography and vocal coaching every day. The vocal coaching is really just to strengthen her voice and get her to a point where she can go out there every night and do a full show,” he said of the show, which he says has been selling strong despite speculation that ticket sales have been soft.
“It’s hard for the public to fully understand what goes on when you get onstage and you’re dancing full out during a song. No matter what anyone says, there’s not a single artist who goes out there and does full choreography and is singing without a vocal track underneath them at the same time,” he continued. “It’s physically impossible. We’re just trying to build up her stamina and get her to a point where she can do as much as humanly possible. The idea is to try to get her pretty close to 100 percent. There might be some numbers where she’s full out dancing with a [vocal] track underneath her, but there won’t be any lip-syncing across the board on anything.”

I seriously, honestly believe that Britney Spears is a talented human being with a lot of charisma. Not just anyone can be a successful pop star, and it’s fucking dumb to expect someone to do elaborate dance routines while singing on-pitch. But at a certain point, shouldn’t a show like that be thought of as a dancing show? And they could be like, “Look! This multitalented dancer also recorded her own musical tracks to dance to!!!” It’s just so weird to try and force it to be a singing show. Like, I don’t care if she actually sings live, if she’s going to be jumping all over the place and making the singing garbagey. Ugh, I just thought about this for like 7 minutes too long. [MTV]

  • Ke$ha is real mad at a piece of shit. [MTV]
  • Jay-Z is going to create an “immersive gallery space” at Barneys for the holidays. (Fun fact: “Immersive gallery space” is what I call my vagina!!!) [BOF]
  • Alanis Morissette is being sued by her former nanny for “holding [her] hostage.” [TMZ]
  • Well??? Do you like Paula Patton‘s dress or not!?!?! SPIT IT OUT. [E!]
  • Salma Hayek looks amazing as literally always. [JustJared]
  • David Bowie will be the new face of Louis Vuitton. [ContactMusic]
  • Kaley Cuoco got engaged to this dude after only three months. In other news, her last name continues to not be “Cloaca” no matter how hard I wish. [Us]
  • Jennifer Lopez‘s stomach is “perfect.” It digests food so good, you guys. Like, all the time. [E!]
  • You: Toxic. Me: Slipping under. No fatties.

Images via Getty.

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