Roseanne's Ratings Will Rebuild Our Crumbling Roads and Bridges

NewsPolitics

Here’s all the shit we couldn’t cover today:

  • During a speech in Ohio that was ostensibly about infrastructure, President Trump took some time to share a personal anecdote about how Mark Burnett, co-creator of The Apprentice, called him to share the great news that Roseanne had really killed it in the ratings!! Television shows about fictional Trump supporters will repair the highways and fix the bridges! That’s the competent leadership we need. [The Hill]
  • Chris Chistie has yet to change his Twitter handle from @GovChristie, as evidenced by this cursed tweet in which he is embracing Jackie Robinson’s widow on Opening Day. Please leave her alone, Chris Christie. Thank you. [Twitter]
  • Small Keebler Elf Jeff Sessions will not appoint a second special counsel to look into the allegations that the FBI might not have followed the rules when securing a warrant against Carter Page in 2016. [Buzzfeed]
  • HICKS OUT. [ABC News]
  • Smarmy hottie Michael Avenatti’s request to depose Trump has been denied for the moment. [The Guardian]

Here are some tweets the President was allowed to publish:

 
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