A lot of reasonable, rational people are happy to welcome same-sex marriage to New Jersey tomorrow. Every other Garden State sourpuss can join their tough-talk governor in the Wrong Side of History pasture, conveniently located just off the NJ Turnpike behind a crumbling Roy Rogers.
The New York Times is trumpeting the news that, come Monday morning, same-sex couples in New Jersey — California’s inverted, shrunken, maladjusted parasitic twin state that was no doubt surgically removed sometime during Pangaea — can get down to the fabulous business of marrying each other. Cake for everyone! Or, for the non-traditionalists, pie. Despite Gov. Chris Christie’s attempt to block the weddings and his suggestion that he would have a difficult time winning an appeal of the lower court ruling that allowed them, same-sex marriages will go forward after a State Supreme Court judge ruled last month that New Jersey had to allow same-sex marriage because a) the U.S. Supreme Court ruled that same-sex married couples have the right to the same federal benefits as heterosexual married couples, and 2) a 2006 ruling by the New Jersey Supreme Court to the same effect. In law, the technical term for this sort of ruling is a “double whammy,” the utterance of which is punctuated by the sound effect of a spring going brrrrrrrooooooinnnnngggg.