Unsolicited Uterus Update: Johnny Depp's Fiancée Amber Heard Pregnant

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Amber Heard is pregnant with a Depp-baby, says pseudo-reputable publication inTouch — who heard it from her ex-boyfriend Mark Wystrach (nice going, MARK). Congratulations to them if it’s true!

“She’s pregnant already! I saw her three weeks ago,” quoth Mark. “[Complete and total silence],” quoth Amber’s reps. Last week, OK! also reported that Amber was pregnant because she was seen touching her stomach in public, the universal tabloid sign for “I am secretly with child.”

Johnny Depp recently said on TV that he would like to “make 100” children. He currently has two, Lily-Rose Melody and John “Jack” Christopher, with Vanessa Paradis. So only 97 to go. [inTouch]

Gwyneth Paltrow is still wearing her wedding ring, per Gwyneth Paltrow’s Instagram. Maybe it’s like one of those wish bracelet things where your magical behest (“I wish to divorce Chris Martin“) doesn’t come true until it falls off on its own accord? Idk. Conscious uncouplings are confusing. [Gossip Cop]

Julia Louis-Dreyfuss is on the cover of Rolling Stone, naked save for a back tattoo of the Constitution. In the mag, she discusses her career path as a woman: “There is sexism – I’m not denying its existence. But I’m saying that I will deny its effort against me. I just pay it no nevermind and say, ‘Get out of my way.'” MOVE IT, PATRIARCHY. [Rolling Stone]

  • Courtney Love was ordered to pay $96K in one Twitter defamation case on the same day that she won a victory over a second person she allegedly Twitter-defamed. I would like my day in court with all the MRAs who Twitter-accused me of having a creepy obsession with Jaden Smith. [Billboard]
  • Pharrell owns a pair of crystal-adorned luxury sneakers because of course he does. [Billboard]
  • Singer Jessie J says she wants to “stop talking about [having come out as bisexual] completely now and find myself a husband.” [DListed]
  • Nick Cannon got his hair dyed like a skunk, which is an unconventional animal to be inspired by. [E!]
  • Bob Saget took the “Which Full House Cast Member Are You?” Buzzfeed quiz and got Uncle Jesse. He was outraged, as are we all. [HuffPo]
  • Prince George engaged in some very important bead-twiddling on his first public engagement. He also met with a dignitary from Bearland. [Hello]
  • Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez hung out again >;( [ONTD]
  • Kim Kardashian allegedly wants to be on the cover of the Sports Illustrated swimsuit edition. I hope she wears the exact same thing she wore on the cover of Vogue. [Bossip]
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