Let’s Discuss the Goop in the Room
Did someone literally shit all over Gwyneth Paltrow's guest house? We have a suspect but please do not leave poop emojis in their Instagram comments.
Photo: Getty Images CelebritiesDirt Bag
But first, as Hilary Duff says, let’s go back, back to the beginning. Last week, Popbitch, a British celebrity-gossip newsletter, ran a blind item that read: “The story goes that a recent houseguest of Gwynnie’s catastrophically shat themselves in bed while staying there, then fled back to the city before they had to face the music.” The houseguest was possibly staying at Gwyneth Paltrow‘s Hamptons home in Amagansett and they possibly shat themselves due to Ozempic.
“Gwynnie’s guest won’t be the only shitter in the Hamptons this year. Ozempic-induced diarrhea is becoming a very hot topic of conversation between hosts there–because so many of their guests are using it. So expect laundrettes to be fully booked from July 4th,” Popbitch wrote. Gross.
Deux Moi obviously found a way to jump in, posting a blind item shortly after that said the “permanent ‘friend of’ didn’t even bother to clean up after himself, but instead, left money for the cleaning staff… forcing them to scrub away at the walls, ceilings and floors-which was allegedly the evidence of the wild night.” Gross and also, fucking insane.
This brings us to Wednesday, when the Daily Mail revealed the mystery shitter to be Derek Blasberg, who they brutally describe as a “celebrity hanger-on.” (You could call him a socialite, but he’s also a writer, Karlie Kloss‘ “big brother,” and was YouTube’s head of fashion and beauty partnerships until 2022.) They added that it wasn’t Ozempic, it’s “just what he told everyone” and that word allegedly got out after Paltrow told Oprah, Larry David, and Jerry and Jessica Seinfeld.