Desperate for a Thigh Gap? You Can Buy One Right Now!

By Mark Shrayber | October 8, 2014 | 10:50pm

Last year, when thigh gaps were all the rage (I imagine they still are, but they were really having a moment last year) I joked that I would be first in line to buy one at Target (because of their reasonable prices on unattainable ideals) when someone found a way to manufacture it. Well, that day is today!

Ok, maybe that day isn’t today, and it will likely be never (unless someone finds a way to put a metallic device on the inside of jeans that makes it impossible to bring your upper thighs together in a way that makes you simultaneously feel pain and shame without actually killing you) but comedy group JustBoobs is here with a video ( starring Stephanie Carrie, Elizabeth Bond, Melissa Rojas and Kate McDaniel) to remind you of how ridiculous and dangerous the thigh gap trend really is. And also to remind you that no one can achieve media-reinforced standards of beauty without photoshop or a tiny wooden crotch stick that is worn as a constant reminder that “you’re just not good enough.” A steal at $70! Who can say no to that? (Correct answer: Everybody) (But also not me. I listed “thigh gap” as one of my fitness goals when I worked out with a trainer last summer. He told me it wasn’t going to happen, too.)