E. Jean Carroll Likens Trump to ‘Walrus,’ ‘Rhino,’ and ‘Nothing’

“Together, this team of brilliant young people have, as you said, stood up to the man, who, by the way, Rachel, is not even there. He’s nothing,” Carroll said, sitting between her attorneys, Roberta Kaplan and Shawn Crowley. “He is without—he is like a walrus snorting and like a rhino flopping his hands.”

When prompted about her mindset before the trial, Carroll shared that she was overwhelmed by nerves: “Three, four days before trial, I had an actual breakdown,” Carroll recalled, referring to herself as “just a bag of sweating corpuscles.” “I lost my ability to speak, I lost my words, I couldn’t talk and I couldn’t go on…That’s how frightened I was.”

And yet, as soon as the trial—which saw powerful testimony from Carroll—was underway, she realized there was actually very little to be nervous about (apart from Trump’s new orange coif, of course).

“Amazingly, I looked out, and he was nothing,” Carroll said to Maddow of her testimony. “He was nothing. He was a phantom. It was the people around him who were giving him power. He himself was nothing.” Whew! Who among us hasn’t had this exact fantasy of facing down the worst men we know?

Though Trump won’t have to pay Carroll until after he attempts to appeal the verdict, Carroll said she already has an idea of what she’ll do with her $83 million: “I’d like to give the money to something Donald Trump hates,” Carroll told Good Morning America on Monday. “If it’ll cause him pain for me to give money to certain things, that’s my intent.”

To Maddow, she got a little more specific: “We’re going to get completely new wardrobes, new shoes, motorcycle for Crowley, new fishing rod for Robby [Kaplan]…” she said, before offering a trip to France to Maddow, herself.

If there were any occasion to say it, it’s now: That’s Mother™!