Hey, do you have a lot of money, low sex drive, and self-face-punchingly high levels of stupidity? Try some $800-an-ounce magic beans magic fungus covered worms.
The worms begin their tragically short lives in the highlands of Nepal, where they’re attacked by a fungus that kills and encases their bodies. Then, it’s Corn Flakes o’clock for the expensive folk remedy.
Despite the fact that this is so ridiculous that I can’t even believe I’m typing it, in New York, some people will drop almost a grand for an ounce of the stuff. However, if magical sexy fungus worm prices in New York are anything like apartment prices in New York, I bet I can get the same amount of sex worms for like $100 here in Chicago, plus the worms in Chicago will come with a dishwasher that works.
As recently as a decade ago, the worms only cost $6.50 an ounce, but recent hype around Himalaya Viagra (shudder) has inflated the price to almost Dutch tulip-like levels, and as the crop has become more valuable, violence has claimed the region of Nepal where the worms are found,
In June 2009, a mob of 65 villagers from the Menang clan in Nar bludgeoned seven poachers from a neighboring Gorkha tribe. The Nar men — one from each household — first slew two rivals with primitive tools and tossed their bodies into a crevasse. Then the gang ripped another five encroachers to pieces and cold-heartedly discarded them. Next month a verdict is expected to come down for 35 men charged in the crime.
Devotees swear the remedy works wonders, but given the choice between having a mediocre sex life or having an awesome sex life but having to eat worms that lead to people in the Himalayas getting murdered? I’ll pass.
New Yorkers Paying $800 An Ounce For Worms That Promise Sexual Prowess [NYP]
Image via Shutterstock
