I Talked to the People Who Compare Gay Marriage to Bestiality on Twitter
LatestA slippery slope is an inviting prospect: as seductive, oily and simple as the logic that drives it. If we even begin to slither down this road, goes the argument, how could we ever dig ourselves to a standstill before the bottom? How can we condemn sex with a dead pig, they ask, when sex between two men is now legal?
Afraid to entertain the notion that a certain X can take place without a disconnected Y happening immediately afterwards, people seduced by slippery slopes stand doggedly in the way of progressive change. Their position, as nuanced as a group of honking geese, rests on the belief that if one minority group achieves parity with the rest of society, others will spew out of the ground like volcanic perverts, forcing us to cater to their every whim.
Same-sex marriage is a favorite topic for slippery slope enthusiasts, who maintain a canteen of taboo relationships to which gay sex can be compared. Incest is a favorite. So, depressingly, is bestiality. The comparison seems obviously hyperbolic, desperate, tragic. I’ve always wondered: do the people who employ this fatuous argument sincerely believe it? And why, if they believe it, would they choose to make it in public, online? So, after the Supreme Court decision that legalized gay marriage in America, I took a survey of the landscape and asked.
Mukala is a 27-year-old graduate from Zambia. Why is he so angry about homosexuality? “I am atheist, so I do not believe gayism [sic] is a sin,” he said. “I do not think homosexuality should be outlawed, but I oppose gay marriage because it changes the century-old definition of marriage. A union between a man and a woman with a view to raise a family.”
So far, so traditional. But why get silly? Why compare equal marriage to that between a human and an animal? “My tweet was meant to show my opposition to gay marriage, not what I really think is coming ahead.” Aha. “I do not think gay marriage will lead to legalization of marriage with animals to be honest,” he added.
When pressed, in fact, Mukala offered a little introspection. I asked how a gay person might feel upon reading this comparison. “Gay people probably feel bad when their relationships are compared to bestiality, and I think it is unfair to make such a comparison.” His statement was meant to illustrate his point “in a light manner,” he said, but “I suppose it didn’t do that.” He admitted, during our conversation, a sense of regret.
A student living in California named Armané is younger—18—and claimed to have been under the influence of drugs when he made his comparison. “I think men are suppose [sic] to love women,” he told me, unsurprisingly. (It is endlessly fascinating that homophobes focus almost exclusively on male and not female intercourse.)
Like Mukala, Armané cleaves to no religion—but was incredulous when I suggested that homosexuality is something people are born with, not a choice. He told me that homosexuals are simply pretending to be gay. “How can you be born attracted to the same sex?” he asked. “There is something inside them that’s calling for them to be straight. I think they’re acting fake, because do you see any gay animals? No.”
Despite this bizarre thesis, and his conviction that “marriage to animals will be legal one day,” Armané already regretted his tweets by the time he talked to me. “I know a lot of homosexuals. That’s why I regret putting that up. I should’ve never put gay marriage and bestiality together. I was just trying to say new laws will be made soon.”