Reading! It wasn’t easy, but also, if the blog hit right, it was. Here’s the vast range of topics you all read over this long, dreadful year, from the comings and goings of America’s worst couple to the scourge of the master bedroom. Blessedly, the blog about what to eat to make your vagina taste good, which surfaces almost every year like herpes, did not make the cut this year! Pandemic-related, maybe, because no one’s really getting new sex, or maybe we’ve evolved beyond that. You read some blogs, we wrote some, and here they are.
1. America’s Worst Couple Is Maybe Breaking Up
Every couple in America has the potential to be America’s worst couple at any given point in time, but Gwen Stefani and Blake Shelton’s amour is sickening in a way that ensures they will hold fast to this crown for some time. They aren’t breaking up just yet—in fact, they’re engaged!—but who knows what wonders 2021 might bring!
2. I’m Doing Fine! I Swear to God, I’m Doing Fine
Jezebel’s very own medium to the stars, Joan Summers, channeled Kris Jenner’s innermost thoughts in honor of the news of KUWTK’s end and found beauty and humor in the madness within.
3. It Looks Like Taylor Swift Was Telling the Truth About Kanye West the Whole Time
Four years after the Kanye-Taylor-snake emoji kerfuffle, the truth about what Kanye either did or did not do is finally out, and in a fun twist, Taylor Swift wasn’t lying!
4. I’m Deeply Concerned About Simone Biles’s Monstrously Large New Swimming Pool
Simone Biles is a capable athlete who can do what she wants with her money, but we at Jezebel are only concerned about the size of this swimming pool, which is quite large for a woman who just clears four feet.
5. How
Season 4 of The Crown picked at the House of Windsor’s scandals and in doing so, neatly unraveled the years of careful reputation reconstruction in one fell swoop.
6. Why Do HGTV and ABC Keep Letting This Man Renovate People into Foreclosure?
Ty Pennington’s rule on the home renovation front continued apace with a new show, Ty Breaker, but before anyone gets excited about that, it’s important to remember that all the houses he’s touched in his past often throw the new homeowners into crippling financial debt and turmoil.
7. Help, I Think I’m in Love With Andrew Cuomo???
The early days of the pandemic were hard on everyone and so no judgment should be cast upon those of us who sought comfort wherever we could find it.
8. American Master Bedrooms Should Just Split Up Already
There’s absolutely no shame—and nothing wrong with your relationship—if you and your partner decide to sleep in separate beds because it is more comfortable to do so!